Because I Hate Brad R. Right Back...
...here's another edition of "Stupid Thoughts from All Over."
1. We start with a WorldNetDaily column entitled "Banned Books Week: Smoke screen of hypocrisy," It's by Linda Harvey, who may or may not be Paul Harvey's mother. Her column explains how librarians celebrate Banned Books Week just so they can "point an accusing finger at parents, especially Christians or conservatives."
Setting aside any danger that the government might ban valuable materials, which is not happening in any community in America,
Well, our friend Laurie Taylor is trying to get the Fayettesville school board to ban such works as Gabriel García Márquez's One Hundred Years of Solitude, but I guess Arkansas isn't considered to be part of America any more.
let's strip away the spin and look at the facts.
Per Linda, the facts are librarians are big hypocrites because they are themselves acting as censors, since they aren't purchasing enough books that make young people who may be gay hate themselves. (And they are removing from the shelves such classics as "Sodomy: Even Worse Than Communism.")
Linda knows this for a fact, because she searched her library for "responsible" books that warn kids that homosexual acts will make their private parts fall off -- and she didn't find very many.
Well, the microcosm of my local library in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio, reflects what many are reporting from around the nation: Conservative materials on the issue of homosexuality are disappearing from the collection, or more often, never appearing in the first place. In researching the catalog of the Upper Arlington Public Library, I searched under titles, authors and subjects for books providing a responsible defense of traditional marriage and warning about the risks of homosexual behavior. [...] My search yielded four non-fiction books expressing a conservative viewpoint.
But of books, DVDs and videos offering a pro-homosexual view, the smorgasbord is overflowing. [...]And time doesn't even permit me to cover all the many offerings detailing homosexual, bisexual and group sex, nor the selections arguing for more tolerance and understanding of adults having sex with children – "intergenerational intimacy" is the new name for pedophilia.
Yeah, I bet there are HUNDREDS of pro-pedophilia books at the Upper Arlington Public Library, but Linda just doesn't have time to list them all.
There's no doubt that any curious child or teen will be able to find ample reading material at the library, all presenting only one admiring side of the issue, sometimes quite graphically. There are explicit titles kids may need to conceal from parental eyes, such as "Boy Meets Boy" and "Kissing Kate."
Yeah, the kids had better hide from their parents such books as Boy Meets Boy ("Levithan’s prophecy of a hate-free world in which everyone loves without persecution makes this a provocative and important read for all young adults, gay or straight") and Kissing Kate ("a forthright, insightful, coming-of-age story"). Because any decent parent would beat the tar out of their kid for bringing home such trash.
For the gender-questioning crowd, there's "A Boy Named Phyllis" or for smaller kids, "Oliver Button is a Sissy."
And Oliver Button Is a Sissy is probably the worst of the lot.
Book Description
A little boy must come to terms with being teased and ostracized because he’d rather read books, paint pictures, and tap-dance than participate in sports. Ages 4-8.
Geez, if we let our kids think that it's okay to read books instead of participating in sports, then we are going against nature, and God will undoubtedly send a bunch more hurricanes to wipe out various Southern cities.
Is there hope that more librarians can come to understand the harmful nature of sexually graphic, violent and dark depressing materials in the hands of our children? That homosexuality is a life-shortening road down which no responsible adult should point any child?
Oh, if only librarians can come to understand just how sexually graphic, violent, and depressing this story of Oliver Button really is, then maybe we could ensure that more kids get bullied just for liking to read and paint, and that fewer kids think it's okay to be who they are.
Leading Kids Down the Life-Shortening Road of Sissydom
2. Our next stupid thoughts come from new Renew America columnist Felicia Benamon. And frankly, we feel kind of bad about poking fun at Fee because it's like shooting a fish in a barrel -- a fish who makes Kaye Grogan look like a winner of the Nobel Prize for Literature, and who apparently gets all her news from WorldNetDaily and NewsMax. But because we hate Brad, we're going to mock her anyway.
So, here are a few thoughts from "Illegal immigration...surely contributing to America's downfall."
Illegal immigration has been a dominant topic among concerned Republicans in the fight to save our sovereignty in America. Closing the borders to protect against those who would come across our borders to commit crimes and who wish to attack Americans through terrorist activity.
Fee's former English teachers have a lot to answer for...
But let's just skip forward to her letter to the President and Dick.
To Honorable President George W. Bush, Vice President Dick Cheney:
As a concerned citizen, I want to point out the many problems with Illegal Immigration. It is an overwhelming problem and an issue that needs to be addressed ASAP. Our nation is under a threat of sustaining terrorist attacks from our South.
We should have wiped out those traitors back in the 1860's when we had the chance!
We don't know who is coming in our country. It will already add to the big problem of keeping track of terror groups already in our midst. Combine that with the wanton act of illegal immigrants practically walking over to the United States causing problems here and there.
How dare they wantonly practically walk over to our country!
If we leave our borders open, we open up America to all sorts of problems that we will reap in the future. Terrorism, health problems, violence, eroding of our national identity, you name it.
Earthquakes, volcanoes. The dead rising from the grave. Human sacrifice. Dogs and cats living together. Mass hysteria.
But Fee's biggest concern is the erosion of our national identity, which is why she demands that the Prez (and Dick) pass legislation establishing English as the "required and preeminent language throughout the United States."
She explains why:
We have a variety of people from different backgrounds living in the United States...this is what makes America so unique. The dominant language here in America is English. Why is it then that we have to cater to a specific group of people and are encouraged to speak or learn Spanish? I now hear that ABC wants to air prime time shows Spanish ( ABC to offer Primetime shows in Spanish ). Don't get me wrong, I love learning different languages, but like many other Americans, I get upset when I have to "Press 1 for English, 2 for Spanish."
Yeah, I too love learning other languages, but pushing buttons really gets my goat!
Fee also hates it when Mexicans try to help us after natural disasters:
One thing that has had me looking on in surprise in regards to Hurricane Katrina help... Mexican troops being deployed to help Hurricane Katrina victims ( Mexican Troops Aid Katrina Efforts ) . Mexican troops had not been on American soil since the 1800's! So it was a shock to me that they came across the border to help. I wonder why they were here. Was it necessary? Why were they needed? We are a sovereign nation...it rubs me the wrong way when troops from other nations step on American soil.
They were STEPPING ON OUR SOIL! The bastards!
And although this foul attack on our national sovereignity has has nothing to do with illegal immigration (which, as you will recall, was supposed to be Fee's topic), it just goes to show you what those foreign people are like, which is why we can't let them live here.
There's a lot more, but I think it's time we got to know a little bit about Fee:
Felicia (Fee) Benamon hails from a military family (Navy). Patriotism was ingrained in her at a young age. She participated in ROTC...Reserve Officers Training Corps while in school and joined the Army in 2003. However the stay in the Army did not last long. Felicia quickly left the Army after becoming ill and realizing what her true calling is, to be involved in politics.
I enlisted in the Army in 2003, but I fell ill during training and put things into perspective as to what I should be doing with my life. I believe that I could better serve my country as a civilian. I am as much a soldier as a civilan as I would be in the Army. Those who fight to uphold the values this nation was founded upon & who support and back those in office who abide by those values are soldiers as well!
Spoken like a proud member of the 101st Fighting Keyboarders!
Anyway, we wish Fee well in her pursuit of her new life's work, and hope to see her as the chairman of the GOP someday.
3. Our next stupidity comes from Janet Shaw "Mad at My Mop" Crouse, who thinks it's deplorable that Dove soap used "real" women in its ad campaign for a cellulite-reducing lotion.
[...]Women look at those larger-than-life billboards and ask, "Do I really look like that?" Instead of broadening the definition of beauty, Dove has actually held those real women up for ridicule. Instead of reinforcing the idea that beauty can come in different sizes, shapes and ages, the ad not-so-subtly communicates the message that there are lots of bodies that need cellulite cream and if the women would just buy Dove's product they could look like "real" models instead of "real women."
Personally, I look at those women and think they look beautiful. And the message I get from the ad is that Dove thinks "real" women can sell products as effectively as size-zero models. But hey, maybe Janet just feels slighted because none of the "real" women featured by Dove look like her.
4. Next up on our Stupid List is Nat Moffat, one of the young people who contributes to the Human Events Online blog. Here's part of his recent post about the Pledge of Allegiance case, "Sleeper Cells of Liberalism."
Consider: When Flight 93 turned back towards Washington on September 11, 2001 the passengers knew from cell calls that they were as good as dead. But rather than sit there, they matched fists against box cutters to deny their hijackers a shot at a by-then empty White House. If common Americans can muster that kind of sacrifice for a symbol, why can’t conservatives make the bigger case about protecting a patriotic ritual when it comes under enemy attack?
Um, yeah, the passengers on Flight 93 fought the hijackers because they wanted to save the symbol of the empty White House. And conservatives should be as just willing to give us their lives to fight the armed terrorists who are suing to keep public school teachers from leading kids in saying "under God" while reciting the Pledge of Allegiance.
When the left, in a time of war, seeks to demoralize Americans by advocating the wholesale destruction of our nation’s signs, symbols, and rituals, they are abetting our enemies. [...]
Part of the problem is that the people doing serious damage to the Pledge don’t seem terribly serious. Look closely at a Mohammed Atta and you can see the face of evil. No surprise there. But look closely at a Michael Newdow and you see, well, Bozo the Clown. I mean, how much harm could a guy like that do? There will always be liberals who lurk for years for the right moment to pop up like a jack-in-the-box and knock a tiny chip out of a country they hate. These are the sleeper cells of liberalism.
As terrorism experts have warned us, sleeper cells of liberalism may lie in wait for decades, anticipating a chance to attack America where she is most vulnerable: in the symbols. So, if YOU spot anybody who looks like Bozo the Clown in your neighborhood, please contact the FBI. Thank you.
5. Louis Wittig, writing in the National Review, gives us a another column which claims "Arrested Development" for the forces of conservatism. Wittig's thesis is that since the show doesn't "wallow" in the Bluth family's fall from great wealth to middle class status, it means that America doesn't care that in the past decade the very rich have gotten very richer, while at the same time more Americans have entered poverty.
The notion that Americans think in terms of relative gains in nonsense, and TV — especially Arrested Development — proves it. TV Land is a uniquely American utopia; that ordinary Americans spend four hours a day warming themselves in its glow suggests they see in it the sorts of lives they'd like to have. Sitcom wives, for example, are all disproportionately good-looking, and the kids deliver zingers with impeccable timing (instead of picking their noses in a stupor). But, strangely enough, in a society ripe with class resentment, no one is rich: Ray Romano, who everyone loves, plays a sports reporter. Doug (Kevin James), the King of Queens, is a UPS guy. Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) from Seinfeld was some mid-level white-collar type.
And Lucy Ricardo was a simple housewife. That about does it for female characters in sit-coms.
But adding weight to Louis's claim that TV gives us characters who lead the lives we wish we could lead, Homer Simpson is a fat, stupid, boorish, buffoon. (And he works as a Safety Inspector in a nuclear power plant, he doesn't own the power plant -- while his boss is presented as a kindly old gent who isn't at all greedy or callous to the plight of his workers.)
Geez, what a stupid premise!
If you were wedded to liberals' vision of America, you could imagine that audiences — fidgeting with incipient Schadenfreude — would tune in to see their betters brought down a peg. [...]If there was some sort of pent-up demand to see the mighty fall, one would expect to see the show really wallow in it: episodes where Lindsey Bluth (Portia DiRossi) panhandles for a Coach bag or Lucille Bluth (Jessica Walter) awkwardly tries to order fois grois from the Burger King dollar-menu. There are constant reminders of the Bluths' fall from a higher tax bracket. Michael had to sell the family's private jet in the first season. GOB blew up the family's yacht a few episodes after that, and most of the cast lived together in one of the Bluth Company's shoddy model homes.But the deprivations of being formerly rich don't amount to anything even remotely humorous.
You don't need us to mock Louis's claims, so we will merely remark that we think don't think it's right for Fox to make the cast live in that shoddy model home. Hey, actors are people too!
6. And what column about stupidity would be complete without a line or two from Pastor Swank? So, here are a few choice bits from "NORTH KOREA NUKES NO: THANKS, GEORGE W. BUSH":
When asked by such interviewers as Barbara Bush if he has made mistakes along the way, Mr. Bush has responded candidly by saying that he has not. That speaks not of egocentricity but his confidence.
Barbara Bush asked Dubya in an interview if he had made mistakes along the way? I must have missed that one.
For those of us who can abide politics in a democracy as well as appreciate work well down, we seek more from Americans than a mere ho-hum when Mr. Bush provides us with another benefit to our own daily freedom enjoyment.
May it be genuine. May it last. May it be deep and abiding.
But if it is not, still Mr. Bush has set the pace for where we are at the present. And for that all those who recognize the freedom milieu that we wake up to each morning should applaud the President for his unfailing efforts to secure our peace.
Um, right. I agree that even if Mr. Bush didn't provide us with another benefit to our daily freedom enjoyment, and we get nuked by North Korea, we should recognize with more than a mere ho-hum that he has set the pace where we're at in the freedom mileau.
Anyway, that's all the stupidity for today. And it's all dedicated to Brad -- for his unfailing efforts to secure our peace by setting the pace for where we are at.
4:52:27 AM
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