The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Should Auld Acquaintances Be Forgot?

The answer to the above is, “Yeah, a lot of them probably should.”
But hey, it’s New Year’s Day, and we have nothing better to do that look up an old Wo’C acquaintance or two.So, let’s start with Canada’s answer to Ann Coulter, one Rachel Marsden.  (Apparently Ann asked Canada, “What do you think of me?” and they answered, “We think you are hateful and unappealing, so please leave us alone, and take Rachel Marsden for your trouble.”  And that is how we ended up with Rachel.)
In case you don’t recall Rachel, here’s a brief recap of her career:
In 1997 she seduced her swim coach at Simon Fraser University, stalked him when he tried to break up with her, then charged him with date rape when he tried to ignore her.  This was the case that put her on the map, in that it caused the coach to get fired, caused many good people a lot of unnecessary grief, and cost her college lot of money, both in dealing with the case, and then to reinstate and compensate the swim coach when the truth came out.
While at SFU, she also:  * Seduced then stalked one of her college professors.
 * Seduced (in a non-sexual way) then stalked the college sexual harassment officer her helped her file her case.
After graduation, she decided that a career in wingnuttery was the one for her:  She went on to write columns for such no-rent sites as GOPUSA, and American Daily.  She claimed in her bio to have written for McLeans magazine and the National Post, but it later was discovered that her contributions consisted of a letter to the editor.  She was hired by Paul Weyrich’s Free Congress Foundation, but resigned after she was arrested for stalking again.
Yes, in 2002 she seduced a 52-year old Vancouver radio personality.  When he told her he never wanted to see her again, she did not take it well.  And when she learned he has started to date another woman, she harassed him and his family via the phone and emails for almost a month.  She was arrested for this one, convicted of stalking, and sentenced to a year’s probation.
A bit later, under the name of “Elle Henderson,” she worked in the office of Gurmant Grewal, a Conservative member of Parliament.  She was fired after the Vancouver Sun figured out who she was.  She then used the to media to badmouth Conservative party leader Stephen Harper, presumably for having the Conservative Party break up with her — but she did not stalk it, as far as I know.  She also had brief careers with a couple of conservative Canadian newspapers, just biding her time until her probation was over and she could immigrate to America, the land of bread and wingnuts.
When we last checked on Rachel a couple of years ago, she had apparently found her niche: being one of the sex kittens/wingnut babes at Fox News.  She was a frequent guest on the “The Dennis Miller Flash in the Pan” and “The O’Reilly Factor”, and had also appeared on other Fox shows.
Now, for the update:
May 31, 2007 — SECURITY officers hastily escorted “Red Eye” contributor Rachel Marsden out of Fox News Channel’s Midtown headquarters yesterday for bizarre and erratic behavior. “She’s out of her [bleeping] mind. She was doing crazy stuff,” a spy told us. The brown-haired hottie is notorious in Canada, where authorities say she falsely accused a university swim coach of sexual harassment and harassed a Vancouver radio personality. A Fox News rep had no comment. EYE-OPENER- New York Post
Rachel was doing crazy stuff??? Say it ain’t so, Roger Ailes!  Rachel later publicly badmouthed Fox News for breaking up with her, but did not stalk it, as far as is known.
But wait, there’s more!  Here’s part of her Wikipedia bio:
In September 2007, a relationship between Marsden and anOntario Provincial Police officer ended. She posted his photo and identified him on her blog as an anti-terrorism officer who had leaked secret anti-terrorism documents to her. At the same time, in an email to his superiors, she described the nationality and activities of the targets of an investigation in Ontario involving the OPP, Canadian Security Intelligence Service and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police and problems encountered by those investigators. The officer filed a complaint of criminal harassment against Marsden with the South Simcoe Police, claiming her actions compromised his safety, but this did not result in criminal charges. The OPP’s criminal investigations branch did not lay criminal charges against the officer. A separate internal investigation into the alleged leak of classified information by the officer is currently ongoing.
So, yes, she seduced a guy in authority, stalked him after her dumped her, and then broke into his house to boil his rabbit and kidnap his kidtried to ruin his career and send him to jail in retaliation for ignoring her.  Are you beginning to sense a pattern here?
But wait, there’s even more!  Here’s more of Rachel’s Wikipedia bio:
On more than one occasion Marsden asked Wikipedia to delete her biography on the site. Her concerns led her to contact Wikipedia co-founder Jimmy Wales in 2006, claiming that it was wrong and libellous. He reviewed her biography and, deeming that it was not up to standard, reportedly helped her to clean up the entry.On February 29,2008, the technology gossip blog Valleywag claimed that Wales and Marsden had entered into a relationship, and published instant messaging chats that they had allegedly exchanged. On the following day Wales announced on his Wikipedia user page that he was no longer involved with her. In return, Marsden, who claimed to have learned about the breakup by reading about it on the Internet, turned to eBayand put up for auction a t-shirt and sweater with white stains that she claimed belonged to Wales.
Aw, who could have predicted that a romance between an older, powerful, married guy and sweet little Rachel Marsden wouldn’t end with them living happily ever after?
Anyway, while there were claims that Wales was involved in a conflict of interest for redacting the bio of a woman he was sleeping with, he said that he changed the bio, THEN she slept with him, presumably in a quid pro quo arrangement, so it was all above board. 
And to those of you who might find it amusing that Wales apparently didn’t find out until it was too late that Rachel is scary/crazy (you’d think he would have at least Googled her or something), Scott offered this defense of Mr. Wikipedia: “Hey, he’s a nerd, and he isn’t used to hot woman hitting on him.”  And yeah, she probably did email him this photo:
But I still find the matter so entertaining that I have to share with Rachel’s Revenge, courtesy of, um, Fox News.
“Hi, my name is Rachel and my (now ex) boyfriend, broke up with me on Wikipedia.  It was such a classy move [by Mr Wales] that I was inspired to do something equally classy myself, so I’m selling a couple of items of clothing he left behind, here in my NYC apartment, on eBay,” she explained to buyers.  
“Jimbo was supposed to come visit me in a couple of weeks and pick up some of his stuff, but obviously that won’t be happening now,” she wrote. “Both of these items have been washed, twice, with Tide extra-strength liquid detergent. Otherwise, they would not be in salable condition. I took them out of GitMo style isolation from a plastic bag in my closet (where they were placed to prevent the ongoing terrorism of my olfactory senses) and washed them out for the purposes of this auction,” she said.
“PS: Sorry that my hair is such a mess,” Marsden adds. “I’m in breakup mode right now and really couldn’t be bothered.”
She doesn’t look so good now, does she, Jimmy?
Fox also provided excerpts from some of the couple’s steamy IMs (messages which Rachel saved, presumably for stalking purposes after the inevitable dumping).  This one was my favorite:
In another exchange carried on Valleywag the pair compare broadband services around the world, and Wales complains about the miserly download speeds offered in America.
“When you talk about megabits and broadband, you have no idea what that does to me,” she replies provocatively.
Hot stuff!
Anyway, Wikipedia is now engaged in a fund drive, possibly in order to get enough money to pay off Rachel before she sells Wales’ underwear and jock itch medication.  Rachel has been picked up as a columnist by Human Events Online (Motto: “We’ll be featuring that Ann Coulter blog any day now”), and Town Hall (Motto: “You can never be too boring, too stupid, or too crazy to write for Town Hall”).
Men, this cautionary tale has been brought to you by Townhall’s KLo, who warns you that abstinence is the only safe sex (Kathryn Jean Lopez : Talking About Sex-Ed that Works).
But women, you’re not off the hook, as next time we will feature auld acquaintance Dennis Prager, who has written TWO columns on why you are required to have sex with your husband whenever he wants it, even if you don’t feel like it.  (Spoiler: Because it’s your job, sister!)
See you then.  And Happy New Year!

Posted by s.z. on Thursday, January 1st, 2009 at 8:34 pm.

34 Responses to “Should Auld Acquaintances Be Forgot?”

Happy new year to all of you, as well.
I read this entry to my partner, who sat frozen for a long moment and then said with horror, “Man, and I thought the voices in *your* head were crazy.” So thanks, Rachel!
I’ve already used this at S,N!, but I have no shame:
Restraining order, restraining order,
He took out a restraining order on me,
So I sang as I sat there, watching while his bunny boiled,
He took out a restraining order on me.

Further verses are available on request.
“and then broke into his house to boil his rabbit and kidnap his kid”
I wish I knew how to replicate a strike-through.
Best laugh all week, S.Z.
And to think of the shitty (and non-shitty) jobs I’ve ditched because of the passive-aggressive petty little penny-ante BULLSHIT foisted upon me by people ALMOST as virulently annoying/psychotic little middle-management high-school dropouts who were jealous because THEY (generally he-dweebs)had the big crush on the boss who liked me better. I should’ve just found this psycho-cunt and sicked her on them. MUCH simpler. And probably would’ve resulted in a more “normal”-looking resume’, too. Fucktards.
Oh, and explain to me again why this batshit psycho-cunt isn’t on permanent leave to a vacation to a nice warm bouncy-barn, where she can wear the lovely canvas jackets that allow her to practice the OTHER form of self-love known as a permanent hug?
Annti -
The tags for strike-through are strike and /strike
Yeah, well. Her dad lost his teaching license for preying on sixteen year olds. I’m guessing the emotional temperature chez Marden was a bit tropical at times.
Which isn’t to say she doesn’t appear to be a bit of a sociopath. I’m amazed none of this set off any alarms for this Wales person. Systematically attempting to destroy the lives of people who don’t want to sleep with you seems a bit more extreme than the usual airily meanspirited griefer mischief.
Rachel Marsden and Jimbo Wales? I can’t believe it didn’t work. Those two deserve each other.
julia: It didn’t set off any alarms for Jimbo because he’s a self-obsessed wanker.
It ain’t so, s.z.
Was it the t-shirt and sweater that belonged to Wales, or just the white stains?
Oh, and I’m sure Jimbo is used to the attentions of hot women, being a pornographer and all.
“Gurmant Grewel”? I love how Conservative’s names so often sound like the poorly-chosen pseudonyms of a space alien that’s just trying to fit in with the humans.
I just keep thinking of the same four words:
Bill O’Reily dream date.
I dunno, Julia. My childhood earned me PTSD and I’m schizophrenic besides, but I’ve still never actually stalked anyone, let alone racked up the kind of victims Ms Marsden has. I’m sympathetic, but I’d be more so if she’d just internalized whatever it is and fucked up her own life. I can’t speak to whether it’s healthier to take it out on yourself or on others, but it does seem at least better manners to minimize the fallout.
I did a house remodel for an older version of a woman very much like Ms. Marsdon. But being older, she had no seductive talents, so she just called me in the middle of the night all the time, accused me of things we didn’t do or claimed we promised to do things we wouldn’t, etc. etc. She tried to ruin my company’s reputation as the price for putting a lien on her house for non-payment, claimed she was the “real victim”…on and on.
Oh, there are plenty out there and old age doesn’t kill them off or slow them down, it just causes them to find new targets for destruction.
She’s crazy. Why doesn’t she just get a disability check, STFU and hide somewhere in subsidized housing to prey on old drunken men?
What gets me (OK, one of the things that gets me) about this tale of exactly-repeating nuttiness and folly is the profound cluelessness of Rachel’s gentleman friends. I’ve long wanted to believe that it really isn’t really really true that most men will eagerly stick it into any semi-symmetrical female who gives them a pouty look. I’ve wanted to believe that there are men who can tell the difference between a healthy, genuine female sexual interest/advance, and the OBVIOUS sicko manipulativeness and rage that pours out of that photo like the toxic ash belching out of a peri-eruptive volcano. The woman has “Dangerous Looney” written in neon across her forehead – for one thing, she looks to be either bulemic or anorexic, a fairly dependable indication that all is not hunky-dory.
My only comfort is that we may not know about the possibly numerous guys who perceived all this clearly and hastily strode in the opposite direction from Ms. Marsden’s protruding starved midriff.
There’s no tellin’ w/ men-folks (& it can be hard to tell the difference between “interest/advance” & sociopathia, especially if, as in Ms. M.’s cases, the target is old enough to be the father of the targeter) but there are a surely a few who realized she wouldn’t be worth the post-romance troubles. Maybe.
the profound cluelessness of Rachel’s gentleman friends. I’ve long wanted to believe that it really isn’t really really true that most men will eagerly stick it into any semi-symmetrical female who gives them a pouty look.
I can sympathise with the clueless gentlemen, since my [purely cursory] acquaintance with Penthouse Forum letters left me with the impression that advances like Ms Marsden’s are standard behaviour from healthy well-adjusted women.
at least now we know where Chris Muir gets his female anatomy lessons
at least now we know where Chris Muir gets his female anatomy lessons
Preznit give me turkee FTW!
Fascism: it’s not as much fun as it sounds.
Happily, I can sequester myself with my first book of the year,Lolita, and just get it out of my system.
A bit o’research found this marvel from Canuck Marsden about United Snakes race relations.
Now there’s no complaining about The Man – because The Man is black. He joins the ranks of the 90% black commentator majority on CNN.
Republicans have traditionally been the party of blacks – from Lincoln ending slavery, onward. Martin Luther King Jr. was a Republican. President Dwight Eisenhower presided over school and military desegregation and the 1957 Civil Rights Act leading to an increase in black voters.
It’s not over yet:
This election proved that race is no longer an issue in America. At least for white people, it isn’t – and hasn’t been for a long time. White Americans have long enjoyed and appreciated the contributions of Tiger Woods, LeBron James, Jay-Z, Oprah Winfrey, Halle Berry, Denzel Washington, and others. Their success in the free market bears this out.
But CNN exit polls show that 95% of blacks voted for Obama. They barely even gave the white guy a second look. And this is what a united America looks like – whites voting more or less along traditional ideological lines, and blacks voting almost exclusively for their homeboy?
Does it ever fucking stop? Will they ever get a clue? Do any of them have any conception that “The Man” is not an actual, individual male (or female) somewhere? (Not the first time I’ve heard this “Oh, look, ‘The Man’ is black,” talking point.)
Oh, violation of net etiquette.
Here’s a link.
I can sequester myself with my first book of the year
Is that what the old people are calling it now?
“She’s crazy. Why doesn’t she just get a disability check, STFU and hide somewhere in subsidized housing to prey on old drunken men?” — Kate
Y’ever TRIED living in “subsidized housing,” Kate? I’ve been doing it for 3.5 years, and without an elevator for the past month, in what is certified as “disabled housing”/”handicapped-accessible,” and it NEVER FUCKING IS. It ain’t the glossy slide down Easy Street than teh republicunts would lead one to believe, punkin. And trust me, we already have more than enough crack whores, we DON’T need Rachel.
Let Canada’s socialized-medicine entities deal with that stupid twinkie-from-hell, she’s THEIR fault in the first fucking place. A lot more birth control and a lot less cults, and this planet might become habitable again.
As for the drunken old men, they don’t wait for black-widow-wannabes like this to “prey” upon THEM, they’re too busy sexually-harassing and attempting to molest the women who are always trying to AVOID their nasty asses. When I first moved in here @ L’Hotel du Fucktards, I was neighborly enough to loan my garage-quality floor jack to a fellow inmate who was attempting to change a tire on his tiny little Japanese truck with a BOTTLE jack, the worst joke ever perpetrated upon the automobile-buying public.
Because of that one kind deed, the psycho motherfucker took it to mean that I was interested in 4A pounding on my door for “booty calls” and other “visitations,” that it was okay to siphon gas out of my truck’s tank (I haven’t had a gas gauge since I was forced into the hillbilly ghetto) along with the white-trash crack whores who were probably doing it to catch a buzz, and then to follow me around the gouge-happy slum-quality “dollar stores” who enjoy a monopoly here in Hillbilly HellHole, sneaking up behind me as I shopped, like a six-two, two-hundred-pound BARNACLE, breathing heavily over my shoulder as I reached into my purse for my rather large pocketknife.
Eventually, he got the hint.
But he still doesn’t understand that women are not PROPERTY or WILD GAME to be pursued with a murderous intent and the eyes of a child-killing freak. And yes, he still lives in this same fucktard-o-rific building. Which is why I carry such a large knife and why my late nephew gave me his aluminum tee-ball bat.
So while I’m sure that a sociopathic “rescue me Daddy!” psycho-cunt whiner like Rachel Marsden would more than qualify for a Section-8 on disability, let her do it on CANADA’S DIME, rather than ours, as she’s obviously not paid-in very much from her own “earned wages.” She’d more than likely get no more than SSI and Medicaid, and really, there are so many other people who DESERVE it so much more than a skank-o-rific twink like her. We have enough crack whores, sociopaths, child-molesters, groping perverts, drug dealers, alcoholic morons, stalkers and fucktards AS IT IS, thank you very much. If that whore ever moved in here @ L’Hotel du Fucktards, I’d have to blow my whole month’s bills on renting the woodchipper THAT DAY.
Oh, and Herr Doktor? Whilst you never fail to provide me with genuinely healthy gut-laughs, I may need to have a small aside with you, dear, about the “veracity” of Penthouse Forum, Hustler “Letters” and other such “literary” mythologies/clusterfucks… One wonders if Mrs. Doktor had to lead you by the hand to the marital bed, if you were ever truly capable of believing ANYTHING found betwixt Guccione’s covers. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course…
And Preznit, re: Chris Muir, I thought that you’d enjoy THIS brilliance via one Jon Swift:
” ‘I have templates of bodies, heads, expressions, etc. If you look at the cartoons closely, you may notice that, at this time, each character has about 5-6 head positions only.’ Coincidentally, these 5 to 6 head positions correspond to the 5 or 6 political positions Muir takes, which he relentlessly drums into his readers’ heads.”
Such ENLIGHTENED human beings, they are, the little blackface-endorsing cockbites. I don’t get to teh republicunt blogs anymore, my bp can’t take it, but Wiki was particularly enlightening, especially since there’s a Special Thank-You From Wikipedia Founder Jimmy Wales at the top of the page…
Ahhhhh, what a different world it would be, if people were just a wee tad more selective where they stuck it or got the sticking FROM, sayeth the old retired spinster broad.
And M. Bouffant? Thanks for the elucidation, but um, the less I know about Boils-With-Bunnies Marsden, the happier I am. Sometimes, about some things and people, ignorance truly IS bliss. Now that she’s polluted my brain and soul via this post, I feel just dirty enough, I don’t need to get THAT… unclean.They’re never going to manufacture enough clorox to fix this bitch’s damage, though her retinas would be a good place to start with the injections.
“I have templates of bodies, heads, expressions, etc.
The contents of Chris Muir’s freezer are no concern of mine.
Y’know, I know a woman like this, and I dated her. Once.
It was a bit of a thrill, to see if I could goad her into going all psychotic and shit, harassing me. There was undoubtedly an element of that involved in her attraction, the thinking that if she’s that emotional and uninhibited, she might be a damned good fuck.
She was. But sadly, she did.
Frightening, isn’t it. A few points could be clarified. She didn’t succeed in seducing either the swim coach — according to him, at least. Nor the instructor, who phoned the police on her first approach.
Ya know, there are times when being a homely goofball with no money or power doesn’t really seem all that bad. I wonder if she keeps an “enemies list”?
I had no idea she worked for Gurmant ‘doctored audio tapes’ Grewal, whose career was brief and impressively Hindenberg-like.
The folks at Human Events need some comments for Rachel M’s blog:
(cut-and-paste into your browser)
there are times when being a homely goofball with no money or power doesn’t really seem all that bad.
I apparently have a decently-working radar for Unsuitable Partners like Ms. Bunny-boiler, having deflected a couple in the early stages and then watched them go on to make some other poor schlubs unbelievably miserable.
in order to get enough money to pay off Rachel before she sells Wales’ underwear and jock itch medication
Did he need the latter before he met La Marsden? Enquiring minds would like to contemplate fluffy kittens instead.
But women, you’re not off the hook, as next time we will feature auld acquaintance Dennis Prager, who has written TWO columns on why you are required to have sex with your husband whenever he wants it, even if you don’t feel like it.
Some Auld Acquaintance should be Forgot.
She’s crazy. Why doesn’t she just get a disability check, STFU and hide somewhere in subsidized housing to prey on old drunken men?
I dunno, maybe George Soros is secretly bankrolling her into the upper echelons of wingnut bloggery. Think of the damage she could do!
P.S. another vote here for preznit
My apologies Annti. I certainly meant no offense do the decent people who suffer on piddly disability checks and have to live in public housing. I actually got Section-8 for awhile, so I ain’t actually turning up my nose.
BUT…like the crazy that drove me nuts for three months during her house remodel (and then reportedly found another contractor after me to screw — both ways — he got it in and then she took her own withdrawls, so to speak).
I actually think that the parents who spawned these creatures be held to account. Most of them, when suffering personality issues, have a not so great childhood they are running from. I know my ex did and made sure his father heard my opinions the last time I ever spoke with him. The apple usually doesn’t fall far from the tree you know.
Someone mentioned that her father was known for chasing around 16 year olds? I think we have a hint of Ms. Marsdon’s possible issues right there.
Either way, doesn’t give her the right to foist her dysfunction of others’ weary brain. Or frankly, to hear again and again over and over, from some forlorn, hapless fool, how such a woman had done them over but good.
Glad at least to hear she’s in Canada. Hopefully she stays there.
Well, the blogosphere and the innernets in general have given voice to every batshit-crazy with access (myself included), so there’s nothing precluding from the aforementioned bunny-boiler from putting her shit OUT THERE (in every possible sense), it’s just a sin, a shame, and prolly a crime against nature that some mow-rahn may actually be PAYING FOR THE “PRIVILEGE.”
As for her obsessive-compulsive/borderline-personality-disorder/schizophrenic/martyr-complex/just-flat-out-fucked-up stalking/pretending to be “victimized”/fucking-up these men, the bitch needs to be in a bouncy-barn. She pisses ME off because it’s stupid, spoiled, fucktarded BRATS like her who make it SO MUCH HARDER FOR THE REAL VICTIMS.
Send this pampered little rich bitch to Bosnia or Zimbabwe or Vietnam or Burma or New Orleans, let her see what REAL suffering is, maybe she’ll grow the fuck up. But I doubt it.
And you didn’t offend me, I just mentioned it because sometimes we forget that, although the blogosphere is largely a privilege of the middle class, we ain’t all in there. It’s not the democratic republic that the soft-handed graduate-degree vegans in their “Free Tibet” t-shirts THINK that it is, as they drive their nice new hybrids to the Microsoft campus or Whole Foods; the people who REALLY need to vent their spleens rarely get the chance or the forum or the ability to do so, but maybe, someday, it’ll get there. We can hope. And yes, I just made a generalization about rich white libruls there, but I figure, after the shit that the rich white libruls have slung over the past couple years, usually at those of us “bottom-feeders” who can’t afford their neighborhoods… I’ve earned that one.

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