So, yeah, it’s standard wingnut boilerplate.
But David throws in some original touches, and thus gives it the creamy WND nuttiness we’ve come to expect from the site that brought us the news about the Nephilim building the pyramids, warned you about “the long tentacles of the United Nations in your life,” and published a book for muscleheads. (Fyi, Kevin McCullough’s column this week is entitled “Why Liberals Channel Lucifer,” so I think he was the correct choice for our las “Ann Coulter of the Week” award.)
Anyway, with no further ado, here’s David.
“Father knows best.”If so, then there’s something wrong with you, because GOD said that father knows best – and God is a man, so He would know.
How do those three words make you feel? Turn them over in your mind a couple of times and be aware of the subtlest of feelings. Be honest.
Do they make you feel slightly squeamish? A little discomfort in your solar plexus? Is something deep down inside you repelled by those words?
In this confused era of feminized men who wear earrings and are embarrassed at their own masculinity, this may be hard to accept, but there really is a reason Jesus was a man and that all of His 12 disciples were men and that the Bible was written by men and that the vast majority of pastors, priests and rabbis are men.I suppose David is going to claim that patriachal societies have nothing to do with it.
And that reason is not, as radical feminists insist, that a bunch of sexist, patriarchal pigs created the Christian religion just to enslave and control women. Rather, men were simply designed by the Creator to love and protect and defend and lead women and children – in every way, including spiritually. (And yes, I realize there were also very godly women surrounding Jesus, just as there are wonderfully righteous women around today, but the point is, it is men who are meant to bear the ultimate responsibility and burden of leadership.)And ladies, the Creator designed you to need protection and leadership, and to make sandwiches for the men. So, it works out well for everyone.
But what if your husband is a big jerk who cheated on you with a young mistress, whom he tried to strangle – do you still have to make him sandwiches?
Yes. Yes, you do. And you need to get rid of all that anger and “work through the issues”, because it’s the only way to save your marriage (and his congressional career).
But how many marriages could be saved if the offended spouse – the one pushing for the divorce, which is usually the wife – were just to learn to give up all that anger for the other?And how many affairs could be saved if the offended mistress were just to learn to give up all that anger, drop her lawsuit, and shut the hell up?
While we bemoan “deadbeat dads,” let’s pause for a moment to ask ourselves a scary question: If a really great man, a Christ-like man, appeared on the scene – or someone even close – could we stand him?I think that what David is saying is that Jesus had a deadbeat dad, but HE turned out okay. However, nobody today could stand Him, because our society hates men, thanks to ”Everybody Loves Raymond,” which made fathers look like whiny dummies. Plus, we no longer properly appreicate the work of Robert Young, now that we know he was a mean drunk.
(Or maybe David’s is referring to the Christ-like Mel Gibson, who is also a mean drunk whom nobody can stand — I’m not really sure.)
But in any case, even if Jesus was a deadbeat dad, it would be the radical feminists’ fault, for making the courts award unreasonable child support orders to scheming hussies who just have kids so they can screw men out of their paychecks. And nobody can stand Jesus, because He’s locked up until he comes up with 20-year’s worth of back child support.
And now, the thrilling conclusion to “The War on Fathers.”
When we break the bond between fathers and their children, we’re breaking the bond between God the Father and our nation. When we restore that connection, our society will be healed. It’s as simple as that.So, women, when you get a divorce, you are filing a restraining order against God, and prohibiting Him from coming within a thousand feet of America. Little lady, do you really want to be the one who dooms our society this way? If not, suck it up, and remember that Father Knows Best.
Posted by s.z. on Sunday, October 15th, 2006 at 4:08 am
29 Responses to “The War on Sandwiches”
I wonder what this douche would think about the crap my grandma (on my mom’s side) whose husband was an abusive alcholic who not only beat her and my mom’s older sister, but his drunkeness ruined the family insurence company. She had to get her separation approved by the Pope (which it was).
I find the potrayl of men as idiots on TV rather annouying myself. Sometimes I wonder if society tries to make both men and women hate each toher.
I find the potrayl of men as idiots on TV rather annouying myself. Sometimes I wonder if society tries to make both men and women hate each toher.
Yeah, okay, the phrase “Father knows best” makes me extremely queasy. It makes me think of fathers who say things like “Little girls shouldn’t cry” and “This hurts me more than it hurts you” and “I’m sorry you made me have to do this” and “I’ll give you a reason to cry”, all the while falling back on “Honor thy” and “knows best”.
Probably David thinks I have been infected by the radical feminist culture or whatever, but actually it was the patriarchal family culture that got me. The “it’s none of our business”, the “fathers don’t act like that”, the “I know him, he’s a good man”, the “staying together for the children”, the “well, you must have done *something* to make him mad” culture.
Fathers get off too easy in TV, if you ask me. But, you know, I’m biased and all, for some reason the only one I had was closer to Homer-choking-Bart than Ward-talking-to-the Beav, and even Homer isn’t a good analogy. He may be stupid and thoughtless, but he’s never been portrayed as actually hating his kids. Outside of the occasional soap opera and L&O plot, few fathers are. Quit while you’re ahead, Dave.
Probably David thinks I have been infected by the radical feminist culture or whatever, but actually it was the patriarchal family culture that got me. The “it’s none of our business”, the “fathers don’t act like that”, the “I know him, he’s a good man”, the “staying together for the children”, the “well, you must have done *something* to make him mad” culture.
Fathers get off too easy in TV, if you ask me. But, you know, I’m biased and all, for some reason the only one I had was closer to Homer-choking-Bart than Ward-talking-to-the Beav, and even Homer isn’t a good analogy. He may be stupid and thoughtless, but he’s never been portrayed as actually hating his kids. Outside of the occasional soap opera and L&O plot, few fathers are. Quit while you’re ahead, Dave.
This is more amateur psycho-drivel. Of course the idea is to keep sexes and races pitted against each other, so we do not realize what is really going on. As we discuss race/sex, the US gov’t clamps down on our Constitutional rights by caging protestors and banning books like “America Deceived” from Amazon (1st Amend.), conducting warrantless wiretaps (4th Amend.), suspending habeas corpus (5th & 6th), torturing (8th Amend.) and starting illegal wars based on lies. Send them all home, vote them all out (and hope Diebold can only make 1-2% difference).
Final link (before Google Books caves to pressure and drops the title):
[link deleted]
Final link (before Google Books caves to pressure and drops the title):
[link deleted]
As a father who 20 years ago after a divorce had split custody ( 4-3 one week, 3-4 the next), I would like to ask when these morons are going to realize that it’s a war on families ( in the most inclusive sense of the word.)It’s non-existent childcare; it’s the obscene lack of healthcare coverage; it’s idiotic parental/ caregiver leave policies. Oh, and these jerks and their ilk are the ones waging it.Maybe these idiots should be more concerned with getting rid of abusive representatives in the House and the Senate- divorcing ourselves from the current adminmistration goes without saying.
“feminized men who wear earrings”? What decade is he living in, that he’s still shocked by men with pierced ears?
According to comedian Rita Rudner, those men are better prepared for marriage, because they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.
According to comedian Rita Rudner, those men are better prepared for marriage, because they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.
I’m not going to waste my beautiful mind reading the whole thing. how many marriages could be saved if the offended spouse . . . were just to learn to give up all that anger for the other. says it all. If women would only put up with whatever crap men dish out, men could act like assholes all the time with no consequences. Just the way God intended, right?
…there really is a reason Jesus was a man and that all of His 12 disciples were men…
Totally gay.
Totally gay.
In “Father Knows Best,” father was always a buffoon.
When we break the bond between fathers and their children, we’re breaking the bond between God the Father and our nation. When we restore that connection, our society will be healed. It’s as simple as that.
That’s actually a really telling insight into the mindset of the wingnuts.
That’s actually a really telling insight into the mindset of the wingnuts.
Hmmm. In my household we all figured out pretty quickly that “Father tends to make shit up to win arguments.”
That is an incredibly dumb article on so many levels, but even if it were logical or sensible it doesn’t rest on the foundation he claims for it: I’ve never read anything in the Bible that leads me to believe “father knows best” is even remotely part of its message(I mean hello, Noah? David? LOT? Please). Probably most folks who know what the Bible really does say would consider “father knows best” to be rather idolatrous. On the other hand, somebody felt “fathers, don’t provoke your children to anger” was important enough advice to put in there twice. Plus, if you’re a Bible believer, Jesus himself said a spouse could leave a cheater, now Mr. Kupelian thinks he knows better?
When we break the bond between fathers and their children, we’re breaking the bond between God the Father and our nation. When we restore that connection, our society will be healed. It’s as simple as thWow. That’s gold-standard stupid, just breathtaking. It’s not even an argument, since it can neither be proven nor disproven. Utter drivel.
…there really is a reason Jesus was a man and that all of His 12 disciples were men…Fags, obviously. Oh, sure, we may never know for sure. It’s only because there were no discotheques back then, so we can’t spy on them and see if all they drink are Long Island Iced Teas and vodka & cranberries. Then we’d know for sure.
OMG, Dr. Marcus Welby was a mean drunk?!! My illusions, they are shattered! Next you’ll tell me that Frank Poncherello wasn’t really Italian, won’t you?
As for the column, someone needs to explain to me how Jesus can be compared to a deadbeat dad. I guess this is that one guy the wingnuts were raving about a few months ago who really believes that “The DaVinci Code” is nonfiction.
As for the column, someone needs to explain to me how Jesus can be compared to a deadbeat dad. I guess this is that one guy the wingnuts were raving about a few months ago who really believes that “The DaVinci Code” is nonfiction.
When I read the headline it reminded me of an obscure song from the eighties:
“Out here on the dance floor/we can make sandwiches/you can be the bun and I can be the burger, girl/out here on the dance floor/yeah, we can make sandwiches….” —Detroit Grand Pubahs, “Sandwiches
If anyone else remembers it, you’re welcome for now having it stuck in your head.
“Out here on the dance floor/we can make sandwiches/you can be the bun and I can be the burger, girl/out here on the dance floor/yeah, we can make sandwiches….” —Detroit Grand Pubahs, “Sandwiches
If anyone else remembers it, you’re welcome for now having it stuck in your head.
“feminized men who wear earrings”? What decade is he living in, that he’s still shocked by men with pierced ears?
That struck me as odd as well. This whole piece (and it is really fucking long) is a total abortion of logic, but this sentence really threw me for a loop:
While we bemoan “deadbeat dads,” let’s pause for a moment to ask ourselves a scary question: If a really great man, a Christ-like man, appeared on the scene – or someone even close – could we stand him?
Does this sentence make any fucking sense? I mean, Kaye Grogan makes more sense than this. The best I can figure out is that many of us would have trouble with Jesus if he were a deadbeat dad.
It reminds of a time my girlfriend and I were eating at her parents’ house and her parents (who are Mormon) had a couple missionaries over. My girlfriend’s father, the missionaries, and I were talking about baseball, and apropos of nothing (I think we were talking about Mickey Mantle or something), one of the missionaries piped up (very seriously) about how this related to Joseph Smith (something like Joseph Smith didn’t like slackers). I had one hell of a time not laughing.
That struck me as odd as well. This whole piece (and it is really fucking long) is a total abortion of logic, but this sentence really threw me for a loop:
While we bemoan “deadbeat dads,” let’s pause for a moment to ask ourselves a scary question: If a really great man, a Christ-like man, appeared on the scene – or someone even close – could we stand him?
Does this sentence make any fucking sense? I mean, Kaye Grogan makes more sense than this. The best I can figure out is that many of us would have trouble with Jesus if he were a deadbeat dad.
It reminds of a time my girlfriend and I were eating at her parents’ house and her parents (who are Mormon) had a couple missionaries over. My girlfriend’s father, the missionaries, and I were talking about baseball, and apropos of nothing (I think we were talking about Mickey Mantle or something), one of the missionaries piped up (very seriously) about how this related to Joseph Smith (something like Joseph Smith didn’t like slackers). I had one hell of a time not laughing.
Earring-wearing pirates: totally feminized, dude…
Thanks Dave for alerting us to the plight of the most opressed, most marginalized, least powerful group in the world; namely, White American men.
You know, I’d like to thank the modern republican party for overturning one of humanity’s most basic traditions, one even older than heterosexual marriage: Winners gloat, losers sulk.
It seems like such a basic point that it’s amazing it has to be repeated, let alone that anyone would try to overturn it. It’s important to remember, though, you only get to whine when you’re being oppressed, not when you’re oppressing. So complaints about Christmas being killed off by anybody other than the corporations who wish to turn it into a mere sales occasion are completely inappropriate. As are the establishment’s cries of “reverse discrimination”, “playing the race card”, and “They tried to cheat this election but we ended up controlling all three branches of government anyway, but next time they might try even *harder*, and here’s this book I wrote about that”.
America doesn’t get to be upset that other nations think we’re too powerful.
Straight people don’t get to ask why there’s only a “gay pride” day.
White folk don’t get to whine about “quotas”, and especially to complain that, having done so, anyone who calls them on it is trying to introduce race as a factor. Nor do they get to ask why there’s no “white history month”.
Men don’t get to explain that they’re being emasculated by our patriarchal culture.
Christians don’t get to whine that they’re being “forced underground”.
People who think “bipartisanship is another word for date rape” don’t get to bitch about partisan politics.
People like Peggy Noonan don’t get to whine about how mean people are. People like Michelle Malkin don’t get to complain that others are unhinged. People like Ann Coulter don’t get to call other people crazy *or* ugly.
And republicans seriously don’t get to complain that they’re underrepresented in government. In particular, Ben Stein doesn’t get to bitch that he has to declare his support for the president in hushed tones for fear of liberals overhearing, and he sure as hell doesn’t get to finish this whine by quoting “We Shall Overcome”.
Let’s see a little less of what The Daily Show called the righteous anger of the enfranchised, shall we? These are the very small consolation prizes society reserves for the put-upon: they get to feel put-upon. It shakes the foundations of our culture when the trodding-down get to complain about being downtrodden, if only because they have a much more vocally effective position from which to complain.
Call me picky, but if you’re going to act like victims, I require that you wait until you’ve been victimized, or, absolutely failing that, your own victims are out of earshot. Otherwise, we might as well sink into man-on-box-turtle depravity right now. And some of those turtles are getting really rare.
It seems like such a basic point that it’s amazing it has to be repeated, let alone that anyone would try to overturn it. It’s important to remember, though, you only get to whine when you’re being oppressed, not when you’re oppressing. So complaints about Christmas being killed off by anybody other than the corporations who wish to turn it into a mere sales occasion are completely inappropriate. As are the establishment’s cries of “reverse discrimination”, “playing the race card”, and “They tried to cheat this election but we ended up controlling all three branches of government anyway, but next time they might try even *harder*, and here’s this book I wrote about that”.
America doesn’t get to be upset that other nations think we’re too powerful.
Straight people don’t get to ask why there’s only a “gay pride” day.
White folk don’t get to whine about “quotas”, and especially to complain that, having done so, anyone who calls them on it is trying to introduce race as a factor. Nor do they get to ask why there’s no “white history month”.
Men don’t get to explain that they’re being emasculated by our patriarchal culture.
Christians don’t get to whine that they’re being “forced underground”.
People who think “bipartisanship is another word for date rape” don’t get to bitch about partisan politics.
People like Peggy Noonan don’t get to whine about how mean people are. People like Michelle Malkin don’t get to complain that others are unhinged. People like Ann Coulter don’t get to call other people crazy *or* ugly.
And republicans seriously don’t get to complain that they’re underrepresented in government. In particular, Ben Stein doesn’t get to bitch that he has to declare his support for the president in hushed tones for fear of liberals overhearing, and he sure as hell doesn’t get to finish this whine by quoting “We Shall Overcome”.
Let’s see a little less of what The Daily Show called the righteous anger of the enfranchised, shall we? These are the very small consolation prizes society reserves for the put-upon: they get to feel put-upon. It shakes the foundations of our culture when the trodding-down get to complain about being downtrodden, if only because they have a much more vocally effective position from which to complain.
Call me picky, but if you’re going to act like victims, I require that you wait until you’ve been victimized, or, absolutely failing that, your own victims are out of earshot. Otherwise, we might as well sink into man-on-box-turtle depravity right now. And some of those turtles are getting really rare.
D. Sidhe: I couldn’t agree more. They’re no different that some spoiled child who punches you in the arm and then holds theirs, maoning in pain, as if you were the one who hit them.
raj wrote: In “Father Knows Best,” father was always a buffoon.
A couple of years ago, I caught an episode that begins with the whole family watching a sitcom where the father IS a buffoon who is easily manipulated. That has Robert Young bemoan that the sitcom-within-the-sitcom should have been called “Father Is A Dope”. The rest of the episode has him convinced that HIS family is manipulating him into not going on a fishing trip by saying it’s OK for him to go on that trip.
A couple of years ago, I caught an episode that begins with the whole family watching a sitcom where the father IS a buffoon who is easily manipulated. That has Robert Young bemoan that the sitcom-within-the-sitcom should have been called “Father Is A Dope”. The rest of the episode has him convinced that HIS family is manipulating him into not going on a fishing trip by saying it’s OK for him to go on that trip.
Hang on….the bigger issue here is “All I know about parenting, I learned from television”????
Jesus. No wonder married couples are in a minority nowadays. The best example they can come up with is the Stepford-Wife-like “Father Knows Best”? Where cartoon kids and a cartoon wife slink around the house quietly so that unemployed dad (they never did say what he did, so I’m assuming) can squander the family fortune on beer pong and then go home to recover?
Jesus. No wonder married couples are in a minority nowadays. The best example they can come up with is the Stepford-Wife-like “Father Knows Best”? Where cartoon kids and a cartoon wife slink around the house quietly so that unemployed dad (they never did say what he did, so I’m assuming) can squander the family fortune on beer pong and then go home to recover?
http://xnerg.blogspot.com/2006/10/family-values.html
If she could just learn to give up the anger…….
If she could just learn to give up the anger…….
That’s pretty fuc… uh, funny stuff. I had no idea so many people thought me feminized because of my earring. Next time the girlfriend bites on it, I’ll realize the true message she’s conveying.
“In this confused era of feminized men who wear earrings”
Sheeesh! Ain’t THAT the truth! Go down to your local biker bar and preach that, brotha! Cause, it’s not like Jeayzus is depicted wearing a dress-like robe and sandals. Or sporting long girly-hair.
Nope, nothing like that.
Sheeesh! Ain’t THAT the truth! Go down to your local biker bar and preach that, brotha! Cause, it’s not like Jeayzus is depicted wearing a dress-like robe and sandals. Or sporting long girly-hair.
Nope, nothing like that.
A slight correction: WND did not publish Kevin McCullough’s book (as apropos as it would be to do so). That honor goes to Christian publisher Harvest House, whose titles include the undoubtedly informative “30 Days to Taming Your Tongue.”
“30 Days to Taming Your Tongue.”
I couldn’t get the harness to stay on…did I need marine glue or something?
I couldn’t get the harness to stay on…did I need marine glue or something?
The Bible says Jesus had 12 male disciples because certain translators in the early days of the Catholic church decided to marginalize Mary Magdalene, eventually deciding for whatever reason that she was a hooker. One Mary ended up on a pedestal, the other ended up in the gutter, and the Catholic Church showed itself unable to treat any female as an equal to any male figure in the New Testament. I think there’s a name for that in DSM-IV but I can’t remember it.
http://www.payvand.com/news/05/may/1250.html is proof positive that male earrings are part of an Iranian conspiracy to effeminize American men that has been going on longer than anyone thought.
http://www.payvand.com/news/05/may/1250.html is proof positive that male earrings are part of an Iranian conspiracy to effeminize American men that has been going on longer than anyone thought.
OT comment about the new look of the page (I’m way past time with this, I know)–but those block quotes with the shadowy yellow quotation marks scare me. I have eye problems and I always wonder if I’ve suddenly developed a new, scary floater (possibly indicated loss of field of vision). Is it just me?
And also, I thought “Father Knows Best” was meant to be ironic, not normative. Like, sure he’s a great dad, but he’s often clueless (in a wise-but-still-baffled-by-these-crazy-kids way). I didn’t watch the show a lot, but isn’t that the way it worked?
And also, I thought “Father Knows Best” was meant to be ironic, not normative. Like, sure he’s a great dad, but he’s often clueless (in a wise-but-still-baffled-by-these-crazy-kids way). I didn’t watch the show a lot, but isn’t that the way it worked?
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