The World O' Crap Archive

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Tuesday, September 16, 2014

AKA Is The New 666

This morning, as I was standing in the kitchen making coffee and toast, it suddenly hit me:  Why must the left destroy the USA?  I mean, I know they must, that’s a given, but why must they?  Is it mandatory — something to do with zoning compliance or insurance regulations?  Is it prophylactic — taking out the USA because it possesses weapons of mass destruction (which it has used before!) and refuses to disarm?  Is it recreational?  Or is it purely business; the Left put in a bid to dismantle the United States, the American people voted to accept it, and now it’s all, Hey, this ain’t fun for us either — we’re just doing our job.   I guess what I’m saying is, while I may not like that the Left is destroying the USA, I’m not about to go stand in front of some tank in Tianamen Square; but I sure would like to know the reason.
Then, as I sipped my Freedom Roast, I clicked on RenewAmerica, and it was suddenly as though my wish had been granted by a bitter and paranoid genie:
Sher, the Forgotten Stooge
In order for global (AKA “one world”) government (AKA “rule”) to come into being
AKA, “stuff that’s here”
…the United States of America must be destroyed.
Also Frankenstein.  We’ve really been putting that off.
For many years now, I have included in my Bio “if Leftists ran the country (and left to their own inane devices), it would be the end of the United States as a sovereign nation.”
“All my friends thought for sure it was going to become a hilarious national catchphrase, like Don’t worry be happy, or Where’s the beef?, but so far none of the major fast food franchises will return my calls, and the baby tees and hoodies in my Cafe Press store are selling like pre-owned tampons.”
Unfortunately and tragically, I was — and still am — correct.
Well…You’re half right.
The United States Constitution is a document that was designed and implemented to severely restrict government interference and control over individual states and We-the-People.
“But due to a typo, it actually only restricts government interference over members of Up With People.”
Here we see sovereign minstrels exercising their Constitutionally protected rights to Hootenanny.
But the exciting news is, Sher got a peek at the plans for “the global secular New World Order (NWO)” that’s shortly going to replace nation states and We-the-People, and she’s gone spoiler crazy!
This NWO will consist of — but not be limited to — the following for the USA
  • Higher prices for all goods and services
For more information, ask your librarian for the following books: The Twenty Percent Mark-Up: A Generation of Treason, and Cost Plus DEATH:  Lenin, Trotsky and the Bolshevik Thirst for an Unreasonable Profit Margin.
  • Total government control of the media (See Rosa Brooks “news” bail out proposal)
Dancing with the Stars will be replaced with Taking Tiger Mountain by Strategy.
I’m actually sort of okay with this one.
  • The end of free speech (US state police have already been apprised by the Obama administration’s DHS Chief Napolitano that all who hold conservative or third party viewpoints are to be considered ‘enemies of the state’)
Conservatives and third party thinkers won’t be imprisoned or executed for their heretical beliefs, but the New World Order does plan to shun them.
  • Abortions on demand
Anytime!  Anyplace!  At the free clinic!  Jiffy Lube!  Baskin-Robbins!  (Note:  Abortions on Demand may be ordered through your TV only if your cable box supports On Demand technology.)
  • Infanticide for failed abortions
So wait — a doctor botches an abortion, and to punish him they go kill a baby?
  • Total government control of ALL industries Obama et al deem “essential” (which is subject to change at a moment’s notice)
You’re on notice, Christmas Tree Flockers, bakers of erotic novelty sheet cakes, and Amish guys who make that fake fireplace thing:  Obama decided you weren’t “essential” anymore, so you’re on your own!
  • The end to small business unless it supports the Left
Well, at least my cafe specializing in clove-flavored Victory Gin should be safe.
  • The criminalization of all political thought that is deemed non-supportive of the Left
This has long been a goal of the global left, but was considered impractical because it required reading minds.  That obstacle, however, was recently overcome when the NWO hired Santa Claus as a contractor.
  • The rescinding of Amendment 22 to end presidential term limits
Of course, repealing an amendment to the Constitution is a difficult and time-consuming process, and the NWO is a very busy Order.  So a decision was taken by the Inner Party to get a Mac and some OCR software and just rewrite the amendment when nobody was looking.  Of course, as the Obama birth certificate job proved, you have to take great care when producing forgeries nowadays, because any tiny flaw will be exposed by right wing bloggers; and as the evening wore on, and more Red Bulls and Twizzlers were consumed, the Inner Party got a little punchy.  At first, they just changed the Constitution around so it established a presidential speed limit; but by the end of the night the 22nd Amendment seemed to mandate a presidential sperm limit (he’s allowed two).
  • The prosecution of President George W. Bush for protecting the country against terrorists (in order to distract the masses from what Supreme Leader Obama and Co are really doing)
Robbing five Las Vegas casinos in one night!
  • The elevation of terrorists to a protected class (Islamists soon to be the global power elite’s Secret Police force?)
Oh, crap, I don’t know the answer — I’ll just have to guess.  Reallyglad this wasn’t a Daily Double.
These are just a few of the stark horrors that are forthcoming — or have already arrived at our doorstep. Without a real revolution can they be stopped? You will need to answer that question for yourself.
Damn!  I hate when these columns end like those mental hygiene films in junior high — with a big question mark.  I know it’s designed to stimulate discussion, but whenever we break up into smaller groups to debate whether we should take up arms against the elected government of the United States and wear our hair in a bowl cut as a badge of revolutionary honor,  I always wind up with the weird kid who smells like Beef-A-Roni.

Posted by scott on Saturday, April 25th, 2009 at 2:56 pm.

19 Responses to “AKA Is The New 666”

Where O where do they come up with this stuff?
It’s called “projection”, akshelby.
Help fight against our enemies’ evil plans that I just made up!!!
Yes, and what a brave soul Sher (AKA “Shermp”) is for publishing this warning while living under such an oppressive and authoritarian regime.
She must live in fear of being arrested at any moment… that, or she doesn’t really believe bullshit she’s peddling. I’m tempted to go with the latter, but then only a brave soul could walk out of the house with a ‘do such as that, so maybe she has courage to match her delusions.
Where do they get it? This is 100% recycled material. Change “abortion” to “sex education” and “Islam” to “Atheistic Communism” and you can probably find the damn thing, verbatim, was said about Eisenhower. The only things that’ve changed in fifty years are that these people are the Republican party now, they try to hide their racism, but not too hard, and the Trilateral Commission and fluoridation are off the front burner.For now.
Sher has the exact same haircut I had in the first grade.
Internet shortcoming No. 6: Functional psychotics can publish stuff just like normal people.
Dancing with the Stars will be replaced with Taking Tiger Mountain by Strategy.
I’m actually sort of okay with this one.
You Eno fans are all the same.
Well, at least my cafe specializing in clove-flavored Victory Gin should be safe.
Yes, but will chocolate rations be increased from 45 grams to 40 grams?
rewrite the amendment when nobody was looking
Rewriting the Constitution should be the easiest thing in the world, since most of these assholes don’t even know what’s in it.
Yeah, doesn’t that suck, bill. Some of us functional psychotics can even read liberal blogs.
Seriously, can we stop accusing people who are patent assholes of being actually crazy? Why give them an excuse to hide behind? Some of these people *are* just disingenuous assholes, and Sher is pretty close to a textbook case. Make her own it, don’t let her off the hook by pretending she’s mentally ill. She’s just unpleasant.
but by the end of the night the 22nd Amendment seemed to mandate a presidential sperm limit (he’s allowed two).
wasn’t that enacted during Clinton’s term? since both since then have only had 2 kids
I hear ya, d., though the only out left to this person is that, if she doesn’t actually believe what she’s written, then she’s a liar working hard to convince others of what is unreal (and stupid). In that case, she’d be more of a functioning sociopath. The unpleasantness you speak is merely an added benefit, as is the haircut.
To the list we must add jobs for all!
Frankenstein Must Be Employed!!
“Dancing with the Stars will be replaced with Taking Tiger Mountain by Strategy.
I’m actually sort of okay with this one.”
…because the warm jets can’t be far behind.
Sher, the Forgotten Stooge
Sher, repeat after me: “Tupperware” is not a verb.
The elevation of terrorists to a protected class
OSHA laws will now prohibit the re-use of suicide bombers.
“Tupperware” is not a verb. 
It is in fact a question.
“Tupperware” is not a verb.
It is in fact a question.

Eshpechially if you lishp.
As an irrefutable illustration of the Terrible Truth of Shermp’s vision, which doubtless you all are too blind or invested in the NWO to perceive, the Great Leader this very day issued an Executive Fatwa on all who do not cover their mouths when they sneeze or cough.

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