The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Taking A Field Trip To The Museum Of Grunge

Okay, taking a quick personal inventory, I see that I’m sporting severe back pain exacerbated by sneezing fits brought on by a cold, which is producing both mucus and mucous, and also some species of snotty tick.  And best of all, I’m sitting in LAX again (I’ve spent so much time in airports recently that I’ve developed an overmastering urge to sell people $25 bags of Eagle Snacks). My only hope is to get seated next to that annoying kid who continually kicks the seat in front of him so I can exhale contagiously in his direction the entire flight, until he finally staggers off the jetway, sunken eyed, sweat-glazed, and sallow, like Patrick Dempsey after he caught that super-Monkeypox on a plane in Outbreak.  In other words, as long as I’m going to be miserable, I might as well get credit for Community Service hours.
We’re spending the weekend in Seattle to celebrate Mary’s birthday, and take in the Cinematic Titanic live show at the King Cat Theater.  We’re also hoping to squeeze in the Seattle Underground tour, which takes junketing spelunkers through the forgotten subterranean city beneath the city, because I figure that aggravating my claustrophobia and lifelong fear of premature burial is the best way to take my mind off my mucus.  We’ll drop in from time to time if the WiFi is good (maybe if I’m lucky I can find a Starbucks somewhere).

Posted by scott on Friday, March 13th, 2009 at 10:27 am.

27 Responses to “Taking A Field Trip To The Museum Of Grunge”

Finding a Starbucks in Seattle? Good luck!
A Starbucks in Seattle… (chuckling) Sounds like somebody’s a bit feverish.
Happy birthday, Mary!
The Aquarium is a nice time, for the record. You’re too late for the Ray Troll exhibit, but it’s still a nice way to spend an hour or two. Keep your germy paws out of the touch tanks, Scott.
Enjoy your stay, hope the Underground tour isn’t too hard on you, and that you get well soon.
Gee, nothing like violent changes in altitude with a head cold. Hope you don’t go all William Shatner @ 20000 feet. Happy Birthday, Mary, don’t mind Scott the buzzkiller.
In the meantime, enjoy the worlds fair, and don’t forget the ATT pavilion, where I hear you can view the push-button telephones of the future. Isn’t science wonderful?
Happy birthday, Mary.
I got here late. “Mucousness” is acceptable. Odd, but acceptable.
Let’s compare notes: three days progressively scratchier throat, then sudden loss of energy and slight mucusitude, followed by a faux-fever break, followed by massive muscusage four times the weight of your head? I’ve been ODing on C and zinc for a week, and the muscusling seems to be ending quicker for me than for my Poor Wife, who brought the thing home from her germ-ridden students last week.
Poor Scott, but many happy returns to Mary (if that’s possible in the presence of someone who makes globby noises with every inhale).
That LIFE cover - - I almost *remember* it! Wow. And Chris’ advice to visit the AT&T pavilion brings back all that darling optimism about Our Wonderful Superscience Future that was very much alive back then. Maybe it was no more than a way to pretend there was no H-bomb for a little while, but if you were a kid, it was omnipresent, and cool.
Oh, well, back to the mucosal present, where Dick Cheney roves the cable-waves unimpeded.
Enjoy your say in sunny Emerald city. I don’t know about the Underground Tour, but Pike Market is certainly worth a few hours, and if you have a sunny day, make sure to watch thesunset at the Olympic Sculpture Park (free!). (about 12 blocks N from Pike Market.)
Other notable views are from the Space Needle, natch, and (free!) from the water tower on Capital Hill Volunteer Park. (Best view in town; see big mountains in all 4 directions.)
If you want expensive seafood, go to Ettas (yum) or Kingfish (to be seen). Or go to crab pot for family style.
Hope you don’t miss the World’s Ugliest Building ™ owned by my former employer (otherwise known as the EMP).
Gee, nothing like violent changes in altitude with a head cold.
Same thing I thought. Do as you will, but don’t be surprised at some permanent hearing loss. Yeah, I speak from experience.
Li’l Innocent writes: And Chris’ advice to visit the AT&T pavilion brings back all that darling optimism about Our Wonderful Superscience Future that was very much alive back then.
I was an eight year old whose fiction of choice was already pulp sci-fi, and John Glenn had just done his orbit, delivering a somewhat belated “are too!” to the Soviet Union, which had been snickering about our totally teh lame rocketry efforts since Sputnik and the first female in space, Laika. Oh well, poor Laika.
President Kennedy saw space travel as no president has since. He had the fire in the belly about the promise of space exploration, and the future looked pretty goddam bright. I would have told you then without reservation that I’d be off-planet within a decade or two.
And of course, everything was about space. Seattle was a natural for this, what with Boeing a major NASA contractor, so what started as a festival celebrating the American west became a science ‘n’ space show.
Yep, the future looked pretty goddam bright all right.
Kennedy of course was shot, and the fire died with him. Space exploration became merely a “space race” and when man finally landed on the moon, he contented himself with golfing, posing for snaps, rubbernecking from the car, and littering.
Bloody tourists.
[the scene darkens, ChrisV pours another shot from the nearly empty bottle]
Bitter, you ask? Perhaps. The final nail was driven when the Challenger blew up. I knew at that moment I’d never leave the bottom of the gravity well, that I’d never leave the cradle.
Who could blame me for ending up in Hollywood?
[the scene brightens]
Sorry, I got a little pensive there. Actually, I mentioned the Bell pavilion to remind Scott of this charming short from the MST3K television program.
…On a needle up high,
You can look through the eye,
And you’re seeing it all–

Crow: At the Annie Sprinkle Show!
I used to recommend the Space Needle for the views, since it was the only place in Seattle from which the skyline was not marred by the Space Needle. But now you can see the EMP from it, which is even worse.
‘Mucor’ and ‘mucid’ are fine but underused words, which I try to incorporate in the conversation whenever possible.
I get pure sonic pleasure from “junketing spelunkers.” Enjoy your spelunketing.
Thanks, Flip, now the phrase is stuck in my head. Allow me to return the curse by wondering aloud, along with Dr Suess:
Where do spelunkers keep their junk,
Where do spelunker junkets bunk?
A monastery, I’d have thunk,
With monks in bunks and junk in trunks…

Your move.
Quick question for JoeBuddha. My partner wants to know if you worked at the EMP because at least that way you didn’t have to look at the building. As you can see, my partner and I think alike.
I had to google “EMP building”–
Oh, dear. Gehry.
We have his Disney Concert Hall here in L.A., and I did a spit-take the first time I saw a model (then they went and built the damn thing). Seems like the kind of thing a skateboard enthusiast would enjoy, but esteddickly speaking, it don’t do a thing for me, ya know?
We had a great time at the International Fountain, which looks like some kind of sea urchin in an orgasmic paroxysm.
Having now seen the aerial view of the EMP, I gotta wonder what everybody involved was smoking when they allowed this nightmare to take place, and where I can get some.
Happy Birfday, Mary!!! See why I send around the Birfday List e-mails? ‘Cause I could’ve included you in the March Birfdays post where I wished our beloved Bill S. a happy birfday, dangit! I guess that I’ll have to send another one around now… *sigh*
And Scott & Doghouse, you have my greatest sympathy & commiseration. I’d gladly trade your nasty, snotty colds/flus for the federal-court jury summons that I got today. But since that’s not possible, I highly recommend buttloads of herbal tea, chamomile, licorice root, rose hips, lemon verbena, dandelion root, gotu kola, blackberry leaves, organic lemon peel, and anything else that you like in flavoring your herbal infusions. As tea, obviously, not “buttloads” of herbal enemas. And if y’all can get ahold of some Olbas oil, boil water, throw in several drops, put a towel over your head, and inhale. Or, even better, throw the Olbas oil into a hot bath and add some lemon verbena oil. Hope that y’all feel better soon! And make sure to get plenty of vitamins A, C, & E for your immune system, with a goodly amount of potassium.
Happy Birthday Mary.
Feel better Scott.
I caught the Cinematic Titanic live show in San Francisco, and it was terrific. It was great hearing the old voices riffing away, especially with the extra energy they drew from a live crowd.
Just looked at the EMP bldg. Was thinking “Electro Magnetic Pulse,” not classmate P. Allen’s geekfest, & had no idea. Disney Hall is beauty incarnate in comparison.
Mary happy returns, hope all are well soon, & that a good time is being had.
Hey all! Just wanted to say Thanks So Much for the birthday wishes. Scott wasn’t a buzzkill or gross sounding at all all weekend long. We had a wonderful time in a city I have never visited, and which caused me to gain at least 5 lbs. due to all the delicious food there.
The highlight of the trip was seeing the Cinematic Titanic gang riff on “The Dynamite Brothers” (imdb it, cuz you wouldn’t believe it if I told you about it) and then….GLEE! I got to meet the “CT” gang afterward and got a pic with Trace Beaulier and J. Elvis Weinstein and got everyone’s autographs.
It was a geekgirl’s dream come true.
Thanks again for the BD wishes. It makes turning 24 that much easier.
Now, see, now I might have to loathe you, dear heart. What’s so hard about turning 24, anyway?!?!?! I’d give both of my gravitationally-challenged tits to be 24 again.
Ah, well, have a happy birfday-weekend (milk it as long as you can) anyway, you darling little fetus.
Don’t mind me, I’ll just be over in the corner, chewing on my hair and aging…
Hey, a coincidence, I’ll be in Seattle this weekend, too, for a conference. Never been; can’t wait.
Last add Gehry architecture:
Blow your nose into a paper towel. Crumple it up. Toss it aside.
Now take a good look at the crumpled paper towel.
I dunno, I almost get the overdone “post-modern”/”post-industrial” fetish involved in the EMP nightmare, I did “grow up” in the ’80s, after all. If it’d been, oh, I dunno, ORGANIZED, and actually represented some form of what they used to call “vision,” they might’ve gotten somewhere with it. Just sad to see such a clusterfuck of waste.
Reminds me of golf courses and beachfront condos: I look at them, and all I see is real estate that would be better used as housing for the homeless, not to mention the millions to billions that were wasted in making something fugly and calling it “cool.”

No comments:

Post a Comment