Gay Prison Visits Provide State Supported SodomyWell, if they won’t use my tax dollars to extend the Red Line subway down Wilshire Boulevard to the Santa Monica Pier, I guess this’ll have to do.
The very idea of “Gay Conjugal Visits” for prisoners sounds like a bad joke, but officials of the California penal system are to worried to laugh.Or to spell correctly.
Because of the state’s new “civil unions” law, the gay convicts who linked themselves to partners before incarceration are now entitled to scheduled sessions of intimacy, just like their married counterparts.
Ordinarily I ignore most flamingly ignorant right wing screeds about the Pink Peril, but in this case…I don’t know…What with Michael’s high, girlish voice, his Village People-vintage mustache, and his habit of frequently throwing out the bitchy “air quotes,” I can’t help but feel that he just really knows what he’s talking about.
This means that prison staffers who spend their time in desperate efforts to prevent behind-bars gay conduct, including rape, must now assist selected prisoners with trysts involving their “domestic partners.”
So rape is “gay conduct?” Hm. Say, Mike, I’ve got a nutty idea. How about we put you in a prison shower room with several of the more muscular, enthusiastic perpetrators of behind-bars rape, and see what happens when you call them gay? I think this could be the best episode of Punk’d EVAH!
This absurd innovation exposes the true nature of the so-called gay rights agenda: it’s not about equality, it’s about governmental promotion of behavior that many Americans still consider disgusting and immoral.
Sure, movies, music, TV, and the Internet may all exert some minor influence on our youth, but nothing shapes today’s schoolyard fashions like an equitable application of a civil rights statute. It’s Phat!
Gay conjugal visits should cause the public to look past platitudes about love to focus on the raw actuality of male-male eroticism.
Because that’s where all the good whacking material is!
Is this practice – with all its hygienic, physiological harm—really deserving of governmental (and prison system) support?
Well, actually, no, Mike. Not unless you shave your back.
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