The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Friday, June 27, 2014

Wait! Is It Too Late To File My Amicus Brief in Dredd Scott v. Sandford?

Let’s check and see what’s leaking out from beneath the Greasepaint Mustache this week:
Americans need to ask themselves the following question: Do I want the courts to decide cases on the basis of good public policy, or do I want them to decide them on the basis of what the Constitution says?
Hm.  Either one of those choices seems a bit too reasonable.  Isn’t there a third, really stupid option?
Courts were established to uphold the existing laws, and, in the case of the U.S. Supreme Court, to uphold the U.S. Constitution.
While I’m gratified that the Constitution was upheld in the D.C. [gun ban] case, I am alarmed it came in a 5-4 ruling. That means we are just one Supreme Court justice away from a ruling that proclaims the Constitution unconstitutional!
Right.  That actually sounds less like a legal argument and more like that scene in Star Trek were Kirk and Spock talked crazy shit to make an android’s head explode.
Of course, it wouldn’t be the first time it has happened in American history.
No.  I used to love it when I was a kid and the Supreme Court would declare the Constitution unconstitutional, because it  always meant we got a snow day.
And it usually occurs when a decision of the court is popular because it seems to uphold justice and is in line with popular opinion.
Yes, it was a sad day for the Founding Fathers in 1974 when the Supreme Court abandoned principle and ruled to allow the continued existence of wide-wale corduroy bell bottoms because they feared the shag-haired, Qiana-wearing mob chanting on the courthouse steps.
Such was the case in one of the most celebrated Supreme Court rulings of the 20th century – Brown v Board of Education.
Really?  You’re really gonna go there?  Really?
I know what you’re thinking:
“Where’s my tubesock full of manure…?”
“Please, Farah, tell me you are not going to say this widely acclaimed 1954 ruling banning racial segregation of schools was wrong?”
’cause boy, wouldn’t that be a surprise?
As the new book, “Who Killed the Constitution?” by Thomas E. Woods Jr. and Kevin R.C. Gutzmanshows, I am absolutely persuaded Brown v Board of Education was wrongly decided. In fact, I would say the decision of the U.S. Supreme Court was unconstitutional on its face.
I would say the same thing about your mustache.
I know this puts me in dangerous company. I know there are those out there who will call me a racist for saying it. I know it’s yesterday’s battle, and there is little good that can come from opening up this old can or worms.
But when you’ve got a taste for worms and racism and they won’t let you crack open Jess Helms’ coffin, you got no choice but to reach for the can opener…
Posted by scott on July 10th, 2008

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