The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Look! Over There!

I’m struggling (as usual) with a deadline, but was still planning to take a break and do a little something with Jonah Goldberg’s latest ejecta, until I saw that both Roy and Doghouse Riley had gotten there first, which kinda made me feel like the guy from the County Roads Department who comes upon a skunk after its been run over twice, and whose only role in the tragedy is to dismount with a grumble and scrape up the collapsed corpse with a snow shovel.  So click forth and enjoy.  Here’s a taste of the Hoosier Sage:
American “conservatives” have been driven to regard even the suggestion that unfettered rapine in pursuit of profits may have any deleterious effect whatsoever as The Drumbeat of Global Commie Fascism, though, oddly for percussion, only they can hear it. Again, this is filtered through Goldberg, and thus is presented as a sort of culmination of everything from Anti-Fluoridationialism through Dirty Hippies Are Having Miscegenated Sex At Lunch-Counter Sit-Ins, to Jimmy Carter Gave Away Our Canal, which wisdom he received from his parents and never bothered to check on.
I’ll be back shortly.

Posted by scott on Friday, July 31st, 2009 at 10:27 am

7 Responses to “Look! Over There!”

Stating what he imagines is the goal of environmentalists, Goldberg writes, “nature is our master, and we must be her servants.”
Right, which is why environmentalists want to harness energy from the wind and the sun, while the Goldbergs of the world want us to keep killing ourselves digging oil and coal out of the ground. In which scenario is nature the master?
Sorry, I really shouldn’t take anything Goldberg says seriously enough to respond to it, but that particular point always bugs me.
I’d like to pitch in, because Jonah’s latest is such a dense vein of idiocy that it’ll take several people to mine it out. Here’s one paragraph:
In 2008, science writer Gregg Easterbrook surveyed preparedness for a “space-object strike” for The Atlantic. He found that even though serious experts believe there’s as much as a one-in-ten chance of a significant Earth strike within the next century, NASA doesn’t much care.
Three things: (1) An unseemly number of weasel words for such a small passage; (2) He name-checks Gregg Easterbrook, which is already a strike against; (3) He cites unnamed “serious experts” (no doubt making arguments which have never been made with such detail or care, etc) without any effort to identify them or their credentials. Suggests that Jonah wrote this according to his usual column research method: Five minutes coming up with idea, ten minutes searching on Google, three hours on College Humor, twenty minutes to write the column, back pat, well-deserved nap.
There’s plenty more. I’d suggest that you commenters take a moment to unpack the stupid.
I’d suggest that you commenters take a moment to unpack the stupid.
If by “moment” you didn’t actually mean “month”, I might take you up on this. It would require nearly word-by-word debunking, so we’ll have to make do with representative nuggets of dumb.
I’z like’s DJ’s imagery.
Tis a deep vein. And does indeed take a team to totally dismantle.
Bout to take on the deep vein what is Megan. Ugg. McA…
I can’t do it. Not yet.
First of all, I appreciate and thank whoever scrapes up the collapsed corpse with a snow shovel. Turkey vultures can’t be everywhere all at once.
Second of all, I am going to click on links now.
Turkey vultures can’t be everywhere all at once.
They manage to hit my front AND rear windshields simultaneously often enough!
That happened to Psycho-Cunt “sister,” many moons ago, Actor. 40-pound buzzard hit her pickup windshield as she’s doing about 85 mph down a two-lane state highway. Slowest buzzard in the bunch, didn’t lift-off the road in time, and WHAMMO!
HUUUUUGE fucking hole in the windshield, but thankfully, no bloodshed. Oldest Niece was 3 at the time, National Guard Niece was almost 2, and Oldest Niece STILL remembers that shit. She wasn’t so much scared, as worried about her screaming-bloody-murder-like-a-sailor-on-shore-leave-when-confronted-with-a-jacked-up-werewolf-on-crack mother. She never will forget that windshield, either.
Yes, buzzards serve their purpose in the circle of life, etc., but DAMN, they’re ugly and NOT the brightest bulbs in the box.
But how in the HELL did you manage to get BOTH windshields busted SIMULTANEOUSLY?!??!? What. Tha. FUCK?!?!?!? Were they hurled @ your car with a trebuchet???

No comments:

Post a Comment