The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, world-o-crap.com (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Quote O’ The Day

“Two hundred years ago we had Jefferson, Washington, Ben Franklin and Tom Paine, and there were 4 million people. Today we have 220 million and look at our leaders. Darwin was wrong.”
–Mort Sahl

17 Responses to “Quote O’ The Day”

And that, I’ll wager, was a bi-centennial observation on the part of Mr. Sahl. Now, 30 yrs. later, we have an additional 80 million morons in “our” country. and the leaders are even worse than those of 30 yrs. ago. Sweet Blood of Jesus!!
You’re baaaack! Earlier today I couldn’t get anything but a 404 here, and on top of the same thing over at The Poor Man’s, I was starting to feel like I was in some freaky internets version of The Langoliers, or one of those cartoons where The Giant Pencil Of God slowly and methodically erases everything around the character.
Don’t mind me. The Inderal dosage isn’t quite right, I don’t think. I dig not having as many migraines, but I’m not so keen on the part where I spent all last night hallucinating zombies running up behind me and stopping to stare at me. I don’t get that, actually. They’re my hallucinations. They shouldn’t be so surprised to see me there.
Also, I’m not getting enough sleep. But I’m really glad you’re here again.
D., glad to hear you’re getting fewer migraines, even if it comes with an increase in easily startled zombies.
Our hosting company had a cascade failure of some kind, and I couldn’t get to the site myself until late this afternoon. I figured it was either a Denial of Service Attack by fans of Shark Attack 3, or the worst episode of Punk’d EVAH.
D,’s hallucinations sound like “the worst episode of Punk’d EVAH.” Try getting more sleep, D. Something I’m taking can lead to totally rawkin’ hallucinations if I happen to stay up for 36 hours or so.
What?
It can happen!
BTW, I was watching “Buck Privates,” and in the course of the film, they happen to mention that the U.S. population was something like 130 million in 1941, so the population has more than doubled since then. They had FDR as preznit, and we have…
*sigh*
OK.
Depressed now.
Gonna stop.
“zombies running up behind me and stopping to stare at me. I don’t get that, actually. They’re my hallucinations.”
hallucinations or no, zombies are actually rather socially backward. They’re also not known for having long memories — not unlike the majority of the voting public but I digress. Zombies are very good with small animals but not so much with teenagers.
D.-
Vivid nightmares are a pretty common side effect of Inderal. You might try asking your doctor to switch you to a different beta-blocker. I use Atenelol for my migraines, and it works pretty good, with no nightmares.
How many internets did George Washington invent?
I rest my case.
Try switching to Dammitol. Better yet, take Umbrage.
I dig not having as many migraines, but I’m not so keen on the part where I spent all last night hallucinating zombies running up behind me and stopping to stare at me. I don’t get that, actually.
well, they’re just wondering if they eat your brains while you’re on your meds if they’ll get indigestion. or maybe they don’t know how they’ll taste without the frisson of the migraine
:::thwaps the crap outta Preznit for being so damned insensitive about migraines:::
Y’know, D., the way you describe the zombies, you sound far more bemused than horrified, so I figure you oughta just roll with it and see where it takes you — you could write the next “Evil Dead” sequel! Bruce’s jaw and all!
And as far as the morons go… Well, hell, isn’t that the whole raison d’etre of World O’Crap? If it weren’t for the morons who’ve taken over our country worse than an entire HORDE of brain-eating zombies, would we all have convened at this very site to gnaw at the scenery and vent our angst over watching our very country (and our kinfolks) being destroyed by these evil fucks?
Seeing as how atrophy is the general nature of the universe, I dunno if I wanna see what the NEXT crop of evil fucks are gonna be like… It’ll get worse, it always gets worse, but do I have to watch?
Wow. I managed to hijack a whole thread! Um, sorry about that, actually. My partner’s off on a business trip starting Monday (I mentioned the Star Wars convention, right?) so I’ll have a whole week to re-read Better Living Through Bad Movies (“This book got the zombies out of my kitchen! Buy yours today, and no bloody footprints to mop up tomorrow! Thanks, Sheri and Scott!”), and also a book called “Field Guide to the Apocalypse: Movie Survival Skills for the End of the World”. Sadly, it has no zombie chapter, nor do I know the author, so I’m glad I got it used.
Its previous owner got rid of it in a fit of pique after the world failed to end at the turn of the millennium.
:::thwaps the crap outta Preznit for being so damned insensitive about migraines:::
hey, I got corpse parts now so I’z got zombie cred
Zombie cred?
You’re hanging with ZWA? (Zombies Wit Attitude)
And where did you harvest the corpse parts, and, um, whyyyyyyy?!??!?!?!?
You ought to know damned well by now the art of proper body disposal, using woodchippers to create your own homegrown blood and bone meal to nurture succulent roses, and how to mix-in the 50-lb. sack of quicklime in order to degrade the DNA past the point of recognition by even the impossible-to-afford technology on CSI.
And where did you harvest the corpse parts, and, um, whyyyyyyy?!??!?!?!?
ACL Reconstruction surgery about 5 weeks ago, they used an allograft (aka corpse parts) for the fix.
Ohhhhhhh, sorry to hear about the surgery, man, why didn’t you tell anybody? I could’ve found you some appropriately pornographic get-well cards!
And don’t feel bad, I’ve got donor bone in the tooth implant that was never finished (hence my smile like a ragged picket fence), as well as in the spinal fusion that now has the broken screw ratcheting in and out of the bone. I just hope that they were healthy corpses, before they became corpses, anyway. Wouldn’t want any rotting zombie tissue permanently-attached at this point, y’know?

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