The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Today’s “Pot. Kettle” Moment …

 . . .comes from Bill O’Reilly’s latest column, Rockin’ in the Free World.
It seems that Bill, who recently attended an Earth, Wind, and Fire concert, was amazed to find that the lead singer (a) was still alive; (b) didn’t use any more crack or slap around any more ‘hos than a white singer; or (c) didn’t badmouth America. 
While “a” and “b” may be true, the correct answer is “c,” because Bill’s sputterings for this week center on the idea that although Bruce Springsteen, Neil Young, and Chris Martin have the constitutional right to voice their opinion (and so those who say the rockers should ”just shut up and sing” should just shut their pieholes and stay off of Bill’s turf), actually the singers should just say what Bill wants them to say and then refrain from singing.
Anyway, here’s our “Pot, Kettle” moment for today:
What annoys me about Springsteen, Young and Martin, in particular, is that they never debate the issues. They never show us exactly how deep their political thinking is; how wide their frame of reference is. Instead, they yell out dumb stuff to their zombie followers and revel in the applause.
BTW, Bill has come up with 16 reasons why you should pay money to Join His Zombie Followers.  I especially like reason #4:
4.  One show a night not enough for you? Get more Bill in your life with access to exclusive video clips of his travels, television appearances, and special events.  Have access to Bill’s world at your fingertips 24-7!
I can’t think of anything more disturbing.
UPDATE:  Remember when we told you that the Russia/Georgia war was was all Barack’s fault?  Well, it turns out we were wrong: the real reason for the conflict is that Vladimir Putin is a vampire.  It’s all explained in Bill’s Column
Now we have Vladimir Putin, the Russian martinet, who is orchestrating the violence in Georgia in order to show the world that the Russian military is back in fighting form.
But why is Putin doing this? Well, like Dracula, it is in his blood.
Putin is one tough customer. It will be interesting to see if the United States will elect a leader who can effectively neutralize him. Because if that does not happen, old Vlad, like Dracula, will commit scourge on the countryside.
So, kids, who are YOU going to vote for: wimpy Barack “I support gay vampire marriage” Obama, or tough, old John Van Helsing McCain?  Vote wrong and you’ll get bad actors comitting scourge all over your countryside.
Posted by s.z. on August 14th, 2008

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