The World O' Crap Archive

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Thursday, June 27, 2013

The Key To Spontaneity Is Careful Planning

David E. kindly brought this NY Times story to our attention.  It seems that Rudy!® hauled out a cell phone in the middle of his address to the National Rifle Association in order to take a call from his wife, in what has to be one of the most endearingly down-to-earth moments since he appeared in drag, or posed nude for Edmund Joseph Sullivan’sSkeleton with Roses illustration.
But what really gives the story that Larry Davidesque flavor of flopsweat-encrusted whimsy is all the effort Rudy’s campaign put into manufacturing what turns out to be a bit of premeditated serendipity.  According to the NY Times:
Was the call a genuine intrusion by an adoring wife? Or a campaign stunt meant to soften his image before a potentially hostile crowd, and show Judith Giuliani in a warmer light?
The campaign insisted Friday that the call caught Mr. Giuliani off guard. “It was a moment of candor and spontaneity on the campaign trail,” said Maria Comella, a campaign spokeswoman.
But it was not the first time Mr. Giuliani has interrupted a campaign stop to take a call from his wife just as he was making a speech. In June, visiting a community of largely Cuban immigrants in Hialeah, Fla., almost the exact same scene played out.
As his supporters chanted, “Rudy, Rudy, Rudy,” he hushed them, flipping open the phone and revealing that it was his wife on the line. Maybe a little cheesy, but the crowd loved it.
On Friday, however, there was awkward laughter.
And after The New York Times noted the previous cellphone interruption in a blog posting on Friday after the speech to the N.R.A., the campaign of a Republicanpresidential rival, Mitt Romney, wasted no time in finding video and sending reporters links to YouTube, where both calls could be seen side by side.
Courtesy of TPM, here’s the video:

David E. sums it up: 
[I]f I’m reading between the lines here, Rudy’s wife calling him mid-speech — and his taking the call — was genuine when he did it for the Cubans. It went over so well that the campaign staged it this week when he was speaking to the NRA, but it didn’t play quite as well.
Reminded me of the lobster scene toward the end of Annie Hall, when he tries to recreate the great moment he had with Annie earlier in the movie with a new girl.
And when he tries, of course, to re-experience that wacky moment of romantic chaos, his new date dumps cold water on the proceedings by taking a blase puff on her cigarette and observing, “You’re a grown man.  You know how to pick up a lobster.”
My advice to Rudy!®, if he intends to meticulously re-enact other moments in which he accidentally appeared human, is to lay off Annie Hall for awhile and start cribbing from Groundhog Day instead.   After all, if you’re going to condemn yourself to perpetually relive the same day, you might as well learn how to play the piano and do chainsaw ice sculpture in the bargain.

14 Responses to “The Key To Spontaneity Is Careful Planning”

Rudy is about as “genuine” and “heartwarming” as mAnn Coulter as shim drains the blood from yet another Young Republicunt virgin, with crimson dribbles careening down shim’s manufactured (and shockingly low-rent) “tits.”
Can’t wait till Fred tries this one in an effort to humanize his wife.
It might have been endearing and showed his softer side when in front of a friendly south florida crowd who loved him anyway, but in front of the freakin’ NRA?
If there ever was a “mainstream” organization that’s a He Man Woman Haters Club, it’s the NRA. To Johnny Redstate, this wouldn’t be read as anything but big manly Rudy actually being totally whipped - in that sort of crowd, it’s something you can joke about if you are already seen as being in the tribe, but to an outsider like Rudy it only reinforces all of them there “New York City dandy” preconceptions.
Also meant to add that NRA types are deadly serious about the gun thing, and I imagine the kind who would go to the national convention are even more so. To interrupt a speech to them, attheir convention, to take a cell phone call from his wife would be more than a little insulting.
Nobody said the Rudy campaign was smart…
Yeah, the very fact that Rudy even has a cell phone with which the ol’ ball and chain can track him down doesn’t look good to the NRA cretins. Rudy is so utterly tone deaf.
While campaigning here in Iowa he expressed surprise that we Iowa crackers were interested in teh issues. You know, even if hethinks that, any politician worth his salt would know better than tosay it. I put it down to his off-the-charts arrogance.
Rudy should have said “I told you not to call me, b**ch!”
I honestly think you guys are wrong. Hunters tend to have rueful stories about how the little woman needed to do some girl thing which is why they were late to the deer stand or whatever. I don’t think they’d regard this as “whipped” so much as “We’ve all been there, ha ha, aren’t women silly”. They tend to couch it in terms of “Keepin’ her happy so she’ll take care of the brats and I can do what I want”, but it seems damned common among the ones I’ve known.
Regardless, after all, of the old ball and chain calling him, it turns out (assuming you believe this crap was anything other than staged) she doesn’t know where he is at all times, she wasn’t able to stop him from hanging out with the men, and all he had to do was tell her he loved her to get her to stop her nagging.
These are, IME, standard themes among working class men who are concerned with how manly their friends think they are.
Plus it does attract attention away from the fact that his views on guns have, to put it charitably, been not so much in alignment with those of the NRA.
I think both of the calls were entirely staged, I’m sure she has some idea of what he’s doing each day, “I’m speaking those damn Cubans tomorrow, hope to hell I don’t have to speak any spanish.”
or…”Gotta schmooze the gun nuts, hope to hell they won’t get on me about my gun control history, did you happen to see my notes around here?”
I just have a hard time believing it all unless of course, they live entirely seperate lives, which I wouldn’t be too surprised about either. “Yes, I put a check in the account Monday, see you on Friday.” To which she might say, “Yeah, I’ll be checkin’ and I’ll get back to you if there’s nothing there.”
Which then again, I guess maybe in that instance, she just might call in the middle of his speech…
Ring, ring…
“Oh, hi honey…”
“YOu bastard! You didn’t make that deposit! What the hell are you doing now? I want you at the —
“Wanna say hello honey?”
“Fuck off you harelipped prick.”
D.: Yeah, hunters are one thing, but as U. Flea said above, these are the pin-dicks who go to the NRA convention, & are convinced their vital bodily fluids will be drained from them if they’re not holding a gun in their trembling hands 24/7. I think the TPM item said it wasn’t very well received by the NRA crowd.
Two things. It’s interesting that deunking this took the uncovering of a previous example of the same kabuki dance, as opposed to someone asking what a fucking Presidential candidate was doing with a switched-on cellphone in his pocket during a major speech.
The second is my surprise that Maureen Dowd, who evidentally had to do a Jim Rockford 180º across four lanes of traffic to get this one in for her Sunday deadline and still make it to the Hamptons by cocktails, had only two Clenis™ references handy, and one of those she had to take from Fred Dumbo Thompson.
Rudy gets punked by his own wife!
Fake fake fake. Meant to be endearing, in front of a passel of gun nuts, which makes the whole scam seem even more fake.
First of all, if I may generalize from my own experience (why am I asking permission here, of all places? I’m going to do it anyway!),
1) spouses on decent terms will know when one or the other is giving a speech. They will not call then.
2) Any public speaker worth his or her salt turns off the g&!@!!d cell phone or pager before going to the rostrum.
Same goes for the audience.
Mighty Tubes of the Internets demonstrate that Rudy has done the hi-honey cell phone trick twice so far. When will the next time be?
Wow, it does sound like at least some of them were really pissed. I guess it, uh, backfired. Well, at least partly. I mean, they’re still not really discussing his gun control views.
I’ve never been in a room full of hard core gun nuts, I guess, and apparently a handful of hunters is different. At the moment, I think I’ll just be kind of grateful about that.

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