July 2, 2005 by s.z.

The First Amendment "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances." Via Agape Press, we learn what this REALLY means: 1.  To start with, here's some more information about our friend J. Matt Barber: A former employee of Allstate has sued the insurance company, claiming he was fired because he wrote an article that was critical of homosexual "marriage." [...] The former insurance company employee contends that he was terminated shortly after his column appeared on several conservative Internet sites. Because of this, he feels Allstate has violated his constitutional right to free speech. Barber says the company, in effect, "reached into my living room, put their foot down on my neck, and told me 'Hey, you can't think that way. You can't believe that. And if you do, Allstate disagrees with you, and we're going to destroy you.'" It is Barber's contention that he has now been "black-listed in the insurance industry," and his expectation is that "I'll certainly never work in my field again." So, by "Congress shall make no law abridging freedom of speech," the founders really meant, "Congress shall make a law forbidding private companies from firing employees who write opinion pieces which might damage the employer's business, because we hate gays too." 2. Now, here's an Agape news brief about a woman who got an "F" on an English paper just because she mentioned God in it. Bethany Hauf is a freshman at Victor Valley Community College near San Bernardino. According to a report from WorldNetDaily, Hauf recently wrote a paper titled "In God We Trust," which examined the role of religion in government. The paper mentioned the word "God" 41 times. Hauf, a 34-year-old mother of four, admits she did that after being told by her English instructor, Michael Shefchik, no to do so. She says Shefchik told her it would offend others in the class, and that she might as well be writing about the Easter bunny. Hauf is now demanding an apology from the school and a re-grading of her ten-page report. As she puts it, "I don't lose my First Amendment rights when I walk into that college." From WorldNetDaily, we learn that the prof approved her topic (the role of religion in government), but told her, "I have one limiting factor – no mention of big 'G' gods, i.e., one, true god argumentation."  So, he apparently wanted her to write a scholarly or persuasive paper, and didn't think that one using the thesis "America was founded by the One True God of evangelical Christianity, and anyone who doesn't believe that is going to hell" would help Bethany learn the reasoning, research, persuasion, organization, and other writing skills that the class was meant to help her develop.  And since she expressly disobeyed the guidelines for the assignment, she didn't get a passing grade.  Anyway, instead of using the school's procedure for challenging the grade, she went to the American Center for Law and Justice (the outfit headed by Jay Sekulow).  Do you get a sneaking suspicion that maybe the 34-year-old mother of four set up the English teacher? But to get back to the First Amendment, not only did the framers of the Constitution mean that Congress should make a law requiring that Bethany to get a good grade on her freshman English paper even though it didn't meet the instructor's criteria for the assignment, they also meant that Congress should make a law abridging an instructor's right to fail somebody for using the "one true God" argument in lieu of original thought, because Bethany has the right to get whatever grade she thinks she deserves. 3.  Also from the Agape News Brief, here's another item about religious freedom: North Carolina judges are refusing a request by several Muslim organizations that want changes in the courtroom process. The Muslims want to replace the Bible with the Koran when a member of the Islamic faith is sworn in to give testimony. Judges in the Tar Heel state have refused -- and North Carolina Republican Representative Walter Jones likes that response. "I think this [request] is absolutely unacceptable," Jones says, "and I will encourage my friends who are judges in North Carolina -- and I'm sure they'll do this without my encouragement -- to resist any effort to allow the Koran to replace the Bible. It is absolutely unacceptable." The Muslim groups are expected to persist in their effort to replace the Bible. Hey, Congressman Jones is just obeying the First Amendment, which says,"Congress shall make laws respecting the establishment of some religions, because if you want to live here, you should be Christian ." You have to be a strict Constitutionalist to know these things. 6:35:28 AM

Some Recommendations for Your Holiday Weekend 1.  Via Ivan of Thrilling Days of Yesteryear (which all lovers of old time radio and associated media should read regularly), via his friend Brent McKee, we learn of a website calledCelebMatch, which uses biorhythms or something to find your perfect celebrity matches.  Ivan's ideal matches are, um, interesting. And here are mine: Your best matches Bradley Whitford 99% Roy Dupuis 98% Mark McGwire 98% John Stockwell 97% Eric McCormack 97 Since the only one I've heard of is Mark McGwire (and I know him mainly from that ep of "The Simpsons" where he comes to Springfield to distract everyone from the Baseball Federation's spy satellite), I don't know whether to be excited or insulted by my matches.  But it is nice to know that there are five men in the world with whom I would be totally compatible, if we ever met and they weren't already married and/or gay and stuff. Anyway, if you have nothing better to do, check out your own future celebrity spouses.  (And if you're a woman, do it quickly, because your eggs aren't getting any more fresh and appealing!) 2.  When not having cat wars with The Poor Man, our friends at Sadly, No! have been posting other stuff.  For instance, check out Brad's nominees to fill Sandra's spot on the Supreme Court.  (Pastor Swank does appear to be wearing a black robe in his glamour shot, so he could start work immediately.) 3.  David at JABBS has a new post that is very appropriate for the 4th of July.  It's about how the Traditional Values Coalition (and the Bush administration) apparently want visitors to the Lincoln Monument to believe that Martin Luther King's "I Have A Dream" speech was about his dream of a Bush presidency, gun control, and the Iraq war. 4.  For more on the above story, check out the always entertaining and informative (but in a GOOD way) Crooks and Liars.  They have the original video (which, per Rev. Sheldon of the Traditional Values Coalition, suggests that Lincoln would have been in favor of abortion, homosexuality, and probably killing Terri Schiavo), a newsclip, and more, including this: God's Circus Clowns are at it again. There's nothing like a little Civil Rights to get them all hot and bothered. I thought these succubi had souls to save not videos to destroy? Oh how I wish it were Festivus again. 5.   The Angry Black Woman tells us about what might be the best movie of the summer: LifeTime's Cyber Seduction.  Their new movie, Cyber Seduction, is being advertised thusly: Open on a young man, 15 or 16, in his room looking at some naked or nearly naked women on his computer. His mother opens the door and spots him. GASP! Her son is looking at porn! Cut to mom saying in a panicked voice, “He’s looking at naked women on the INTERNET!” to dad. Dad doesn’t seem concerned. Annoying female voice of Lifetime keeps interjecting with phrases like: “A tragedy that will tear a family apart.” Cut to another woman saying to mom, “Internet porn destroyed my marriage.” Cut to more pictures of nearly naked women. Cut to mom screaming at her son, “You’re ADDICTED! You can’t stop!” That’s pretty much it. A 16 year old boy who can’t stop looking at naked women? OH GOD! Someone call the Guinness people, a teenage boy has become enamored of naked ladies and can’t stop! It's the Ben Shapiro After-School Special that I always wanted to make!  As they say, read the whole thing.  And then scroll down to the post about John Stossel.  (We may actually watch Cyber Seduction for a Sunday Cinema feature, because it sounds like our kind of thing: cheesy, overwrought, and moralistic.  More on this later.) 6.  Jorge at Media in Trouble directs a little ire at Gwen Ifil and at opinion-based news. Believe? Believe? What do you mean we don't Believe in this. This is where the media is going wrong. So all that soul searching that they have or haven't been doing as of late comes down to this. The News Is NOT A FAITH BASED INSTITUTION. The News is a FACT BASED INSTITUTION. Or so it should be. You don't report what people believe. You report what is. Oh, if only Gwen and the rest took heed to his remarks. 7.  And Krup at Justsayin' has a bunch of good stuff, including a a timely pitch for Bring Them Home Now, a very interesting post about Paul Winchell (whom, we learn, was more than just the voice of Tigger), and a moving video Is it Worth It?  Check it out.     5:44:08 AM