That’s the theme of our post for today. It was suggested by Debbie Schlussel, whose latest movie review is titled “So, Lois Lane is a Single Mom . . . & a Slut: Notes on Superman Returns”
In it, Debbie explains that Lois slept with two men during the same time frame, wasn’t sure which one fathered her baby, and won a Pulitzer, so she’s a slut. Previously, Debbie has described Sharon Stone as an ”aging slut,” has referred to Angelina Jolie as a “slank,” and called Star Jones as a “whore” So, she’s kinda into labeling.
But interestingly enough, when a blogger (okay, that Rottweiler guy) called her an “ignorant slut,” she demanded deletion of the item, a retraction, and still threatened to sue him. (“Please note that because the defamation you engaged in was sexual in nature–making it defamation per se–your prominent, written retraction and deletion of the items does not relieve you of liability for money damages, which we will be pursuing in Michigan court.”)
While I’m too lazy to do any research into the outcome of her Michigan lawsuit, I imagine that she won a partial victory, since while she would have had to concede the “ignorant” part, she’s clearly no “saucy girl” (although she may well be a “slovenly woman”).
And while Sharon, Angelina, and Star may be feeling a bit defamed, I’m sure Debbie just made her comments about them the spirit of good-natured fun, and so they’d better not join Lois in filing a class-action suit against Debbie, since everyone knows that when conservative is joking, she is above criticism..
And speaking of sluts and humor, Ann Coulter gave another interview to Human Events Online. Here’s the part where Ann explains that when she calls for other people’s deaths, she’s just kidding — can’t you liberals take a joke?
Is it accurate for your defenders to say that a lot of what you write is tongue-in-cheek?Obviously some of the things I write are tongue-in-cheek. These are known in the writing business as “jokes.” Liberals pretend that they can’t tell if I’m joking or not because they think people will actually believe, just to pick one example, that I have seriously called for the murder of a U.S. congressman. (I described John Murtha as: “the reason soldiers invented fragging.”) Fortunately, my readers are not as stupid as liberals and know a joke when they hear one.
Yeah, her readers can tell that remark about Murtha was a joke because it was so damned funny. And hey, just because a “lack of empathy” is one of the key symptoms of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, nobody should be thinking that Ann is suffering from it. (You should think it because she seems to be suffering from ALL the symptoms.)
And speaking of how women are all whores who put their Pulitzers before finding true love with worthy men like Christian Hartsock, here’s young Mr. Hartsock with “”The politics of the bedroom.”
Liberals are like babies. They are. You give a baby a beautiful, shining glass vase and he’ll smash it on the floor. In the same way, God gave us marriage and sex and liberals have ruined both of those too.
Wait, God gave us marriage and sex and liberals, and babies ruined all of them? Damned babies!
(But I thought it was the gays who ruined marriage, and porn that ruined sex – Christian is going to get in trouble for not adhering to the guidelines of the Wingnut Style Manual.)
In the 1950s, marriage was something women looked forward to, so much that they married at ages like 19 and 20. (Part of the reason was because they were actually waiting until marriage to have sex, unlike liberals, who encourage young teenagers to lick condoms and show their “orgasm faces” in front of a camera during mandatory “AIDS Awareness” presentations.)To a woman, a man interested in commitment was the biggest turn-on. It was commitment that young women longed for.
If only 20-year-old Christian could have lived in the 1950’s, then his desire for life-long commitment would have been admired and appreciated, and he would have been considered a sexy studmuffin. Then he could have slept with SCADS of women!
In fact, for generations since, the stereotype has been that women long for commitment while men have at least fourteen one-night-stands to get out of their system before they even consider settling down with a woman. (And even after they’re married if they find another one buried deep under the cushions, oh well! A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.)
Just how many generations since the 1950’s does Christian think there have been?
(And you’ll note that Christian thinks that this “stereotype” is actually a blueprint for how things should be, and the problem is that women are ruining things by not embracing this double standard.)
But not anymore. Today women are afraid of commitment. While they may have a soft spot for songs with lyrics like “If you leave me now, you’ll take away the biggest part of me” or “Michelle…I need you, I need you, I need you…,” if you yourself utter those words to a woman, she will accuse you of “overwhelming” or “suffocating” her and will immediately dash to open the nearest window and gasp for breath.
I think we need to have a contest where we try to guess what recent incident in Christian’s life triggered this column. (I’m going to say that it involved him breaking into Michelle Malkin’s house, but her not appreciating his naked serenade or attempts to suffocate her.)
This is what feminism has done to women. It has demonized marriage, it has demolished prudence, and it has denigrated the concept of commitment.
And it has desiccated the practice of singing Peter Cetera songs to one’s stalkee.
But yeah, it’s all feminism’s fault that young virgins don’t flock to Christian, demanding that he marry them.
Aside from seeing it as a form of chauvinistic slavery, liberals see marriage as a commitment in the same way they see talking to someone on the subway as a commitment. Remember when first base was asking a girl out, second base was kissing her, and third base was a relationship?
Um, no, I don’t remember that. I can only guess that Christian is from an alternate universe where a “home run” is “a friendly handshake.”
Well now, first base is having sex, second base is getting married, and third base is leaving your spouse for Angelina Jolie.Nowadays, for women, the prerequisites to getting married (whatever that means) are having sex with about a dozen men and having at least one abortion (and preferably a partial-birth one).
I guess I should ask Ann Coulter’s readers if that was a joke. I mean, nobody was killed, maimed, or poisoned in it, but it did make reference to “partial-birth abortion,” and it wasn’t all that funny — so I’m thinking that Christian’s tongue was in his cheek (which is as good a place as any for it) when he wrote those lines.
But I could be wrong, since I just don’t get conservative “humor.”
If liberals only knew what they were missing out on with their hedonism and their debauchery and their insistence on fornicating with every fish in the sea before they do the whole “marriage” thing, they would realize that it is devout Christians who are having the best sex right now out of anyone on the planet.
I’m assuming that Christian doesn’t know about all the hot Christian sex from personal experience, since he is unmarried. But when he does find a gal who will commit to him, man, it will be so sweet! He will be having the best sex on the planet for hours on end. Take that, lefty scum!
No, wait, it can never happen now, since the liberal babies broke marriage and sex with all their fish fornication. Sorry, Mr. Hartsock – there will be no sex for you!
67 Responses to “Sluts!”
“In the 1950s, marriage was something women looked forward to, so much that they married at ages like 19 or 20. (Part of the reason was because they were actually waiting until marriage to have sex…)”
In other words, the sooner they got married, the sooner they’d be able to fuck.
Yeah, teens had tremendous willpower back then.
In other words, the sooner they got married, the sooner they’d be able to fuck.
Yeah, teens had tremendous willpower back then.
Oh, and you’re right about Adam’s-Apple Annie. In fact, judging from the list of symptoms for NPD, I’d say a LOT of wingnuts are afflicted.
If “Christians are having the best sex of anyone on the planet” how come there’s no such thing as “Christian porn”? You’d think there’d be some kind of market for it. The only thing people like Hartsock appear to really get off on is virginity (in women, that is)-they seem to fetishize it to a point I find deeply, deeply disturbing.
Shit! Shit, shit, shit! I wanted that damn Harstock column! Hell and damnation!!! 
Lois Lane is not a slut. Clearly in the movie, she knows her son is the son of Superman. That she doesn’t reveal this to her fiance does NOT mean she slept with him. We only know they are engaged. For all any of us know from the movie, she could have already delivered the baby when he even showed up.
Now, Debbie Shlussel sure SOUNDS like a slut…since, you know, she seems to be an expert on what it takes to be one, judging all these other women.
And Deb? GO ahead and sue. I’ll have you tied up in court for years.
But you’d probably enjoy that, you little sl…ease.
Now, Debbie Shlussel sure SOUNDS like a slut…since, you know, she seems to be an expert on what it takes to be one, judging all these other women.
And Deb? GO ahead and sue. I’ll have you tied up in court for years.
But you’d probably enjoy that, you little sl…ease.
Wait, God gave us marriage and sex and liberals, and babies ruined all of them? Damned babies!
Imagine if He gave us crystal vases…
Imagine if He gave us crystal vases…
James Wolcott referred me to the Debbie Schlussel column on Sharon Stone. For the first time, I truly understood the meaning of the word “skank,” i.e. someone who goes well beyond slutty to the point where her interest in sex edges over into just plain gross.
I’m glad no one seems to know anything about Debbie’s private life. I’m sure it would be pretty disgusting. Then again, knowing wingnuts, her private life is probably pretty dreary and unfulfilling, which is why she has to have such an overactive imagination.
I’m glad no one seems to know anything about Debbie’s private life. I’m sure it would be pretty disgusting. Then again, knowing wingnuts, her private life is probably pretty dreary and unfulfilling, which is why she has to have such an overactive imagination.
“In the 1950s, marriage was something women looked forward to, so much that they married at ages like 19 or 20.
Maybe that’s because women were pressured to set themselves so low that they couldn’t be anything more than trophy wife, teacher, secretary or nurse (the later three were to be dropped when they married.)
Maybe that’s because women were pressured to set themselves so low that they couldn’t be anything more than trophy wife, teacher, secretary or nurse (the later three were to be dropped when they married.)
Is is just me or does Debbie Schlussel look like total bitch. So many of those neo-con women seem to lack a little something called warmth if you ask me.
“Nowadays?” “Nowadays!?” What barely post teenager uses the word “nowadays?” So this barely post-wanking-in-the-bathroom child is suddenly an expert on sex and relationships? Methinks young Christian needs to “season” a bit before bloviating.
…it is devout Christians who are having the best sex right now out of anyone on the planet.
(spits out his latte all over his new Volvo)
Actually, this is true. Why, just yesterday, I saw an empty display rack of “Christians Gone Wild!” at my local sex store. Those god-fearing girls sure love showing it off for the camera!
So, if Christian’s god gave us sex, does that mean that he/she/it/them/Chtulhu also gave animals sex? After all, birds do it, bees do it, even barely-educated wingnuts do it. Does that mean humans and animals have something in common? Like there might be a link between us? But…sex…50s…marriage…BABIES!…(KABOOM!)
(spits out his latte all over his new Volvo)
Actually, this is true. Why, just yesterday, I saw an empty display rack of “Christians Gone Wild!” at my local sex store. Those god-fearing girls sure love showing it off for the camera!
So, if Christian’s god gave us sex, does that mean that he/she/it/them/Chtulhu also gave animals sex? After all, birds do it, bees do it, even barely-educated wingnuts do it. Does that mean humans and animals have something in common? Like there might be a link between us? But…sex…50s…marriage…BABIES!…(KABOOM!)
Speaking as a female, I am SO COSMICALLY TIRED of this “slut” thing. I thought that a fairly large segment of late-20th English speaking society had decided that sex was not, in itself, bad or dirty. I thought that, similarly, it had been pretty much conluded by a working majority that it is okay for males AND females to have sexual desire and want to express it.
I grew up in the fucking 50s in the NYC area and while it wasn’t the slums, it wasn’t any hermetically-sealed social setting either. I knew quite a few reasonably tough girls, and I recall hearing the word slut maybe 2 or 3 times in my entire school career.
Where did this pervasive middle-class notion come from – and if I’m to believe the views promulgated in purportedly bestselling Teen Bitch novels like the Clique series, upper-class, too – the notion that girls or women who are sexual beings and not ashamed of it, are automatically dirty unpaid whores willing to take on any and every cock available, which is what I take the word to mean?
Sorry to be ranting, I haven’t had breakfast. Happy 3rd of July, my fellow Americans!
I grew up in the fucking 50s in the NYC area and while it wasn’t the slums, it wasn’t any hermetically-sealed social setting either. I knew quite a few reasonably tough girls, and I recall hearing the word slut maybe 2 or 3 times in my entire school career.
Where did this pervasive middle-class notion come from – and if I’m to believe the views promulgated in purportedly bestselling Teen Bitch novels like the Clique series, upper-class, too – the notion that girls or women who are sexual beings and not ashamed of it, are automatically dirty unpaid whores willing to take on any and every cock available, which is what I take the word to mean?
Sorry to be ranting, I haven’t had breakfast. Happy 3rd of July, my fellow Americans!
If liberals only knew what they were missing out on with their hedonism and their debauchery and their insistence on fornicating with every fish in the sea
Louie: Hey, I thought you said Troy McClure was dead.
Tony: No, what I said was: “He sleeps with the fishes”. You see…
maybe that’s why that book was called “Party of Death,” ol’ Ramesh Ponnuru just got confused
Louie: Hey, I thought you said Troy McClure was dead.
Tony: No, what I said was: “He sleeps with the fishes”. You see…
maybe that’s why that book was called “Party of Death,” ol’ Ramesh Ponnuru just got confused
Some wingnut posted Schlussel’s column on the Internet Movie Database. I posted this as a reply:
Schlussel is a moron. Always has been. An Ann Coulter wannabe with a mouth set to “spew.”
If she is anything like Ann, then she really knows masculinity…
My favorite part is how she decries “political correctness,” then frets about the kind of “message” the film sends to kids. Wow, Deb. Deep. Stupid, but deep.
I guess PC is in the eye of the beholder…
Schlussel is a moron. Always has been. An Ann Coulter wannabe with a mouth set to “spew.”
If she is anything like Ann, then she really knows masculinity…
My favorite part is how she decries “political correctness,” then frets about the kind of “message” the film sends to kids. Wow, Deb. Deep. Stupid, but deep.
I guess PC is in the eye of the beholder…
I just don’t get conservative “humor.”
Easy. It’s when non-conservatives get hurt. (For cerebral conservative humor, substitute “humiliated” for “hurt.”)
Easy. It’s when non-conservatives get hurt. (For cerebral conservative humor, substitute “humiliated” for “hurt.”)
I can just see what it must have been like for young Mr. Hartsock to have to attend a “mandatory AIDS awareness” program and have to show the girls there his “orgasm” face. Even after washing out my eyes with bleach, I still see him doing a very bad Drew from Office Space impression. “O! O! Y’know what I’m talking about? O!”
And even after they’re married if they find another one buried deep under the cushions, oh well!
Women buried in couchs?
Women buried in couchs?
I think Mr. Hartsock should stop uttering words to women, especially strangers on the bus.
If liberals only knew what they were missing out on with their hedonism and their debauchery and their insistence on fornicating with every fish in the sea…
I admit I am a value-less amoralist, but in my lexicon, hedonism and debauchery and fornicating would be the very opposite of “missing out.”
If this guy ever does get married and spawn, it would behoove any day-care facilities in his vicinity to just close up shop now before being bankrupted by legal fees.
If liberals only knew what they were missing out on with their hedonism and their debauchery and their insistence on fornicating with every fish in the sea…
I admit I am a value-less amoralist, but in my lexicon, hedonism and debauchery and fornicating would be the very opposite of “missing out.”
If this guy ever does get married and spawn, it would behoove any day-care facilities in his vicinity to just close up shop now before being bankrupted by legal fees.
Wow, Debbie is a total slut.
Here’s the thing about Ann Coulter; she’s always kidding on the square, to use Franken’s term.
Her “humour” is basically one joke: Wouldn’t it be funny if something bad happened to my enemies? Ha ha!
And it’s usually not even a FUNNY bad thing; It’s not like saying “I hope Ann Coulter falls into a septic tank”, it’s like saying “I hope Ann Coulter gets hit by a car”. The latter is really only funny if you’re a sociopath.
It’s pretty much the lowest possible rung on the humerical ladder, and, really, barely even qualifies as humour at all. It’s a technique that reeks of desperation, impotence amd projection.
Here’s the thing about Ann Coulter; she’s always kidding on the square, to use Franken’s term.
Her “humour” is basically one joke: Wouldn’t it be funny if something bad happened to my enemies? Ha ha!
And it’s usually not even a FUNNY bad thing; It’s not like saying “I hope Ann Coulter falls into a septic tank”, it’s like saying “I hope Ann Coulter gets hit by a car”. The latter is really only funny if you’re a sociopath.
It’s pretty much the lowest possible rung on the humerical ladder, and, really, barely even qualifies as humour at all. It’s a technique that reeks of desperation, impotence amd projection.
I’m seeing a direct correlation between my orgasm face and abstinence.
“In the 1950s, marriage was something women looked forward to, so much that they married at ages like 19 and 20. (Part of the reason was because they were actually waiting until marriage to have sex,”
And another part of the reason was that young women were not encouraged (or in some cases allowed) to continue their education past high school. So you know, their wasn’t much for them to do but hang around the house and sigh wistfully at the boys outside their window.
I would have to check statistics, but “19 or 20″ seems to be a bit on the high end. (“Sweet 16″ was “sweet” because she’s totally do-able now, boys!) And, of course, it doesn’t matter much if girls in the 60s and 70s wanted to get married or not, since most of the *boys* were off in some jungle spreading democracy.
But it’s totally liberals who ruined marriage. Totally!
unlike liberals, who encourage young teenagers to lick condoms and show their “orgasm faces” in front of a camera during mandatory “AIDS Awareness” presentations.)
And another part of the reason was that young women were not encouraged (or in some cases allowed) to continue their education past high school. So you know, their wasn’t much for them to do but hang around the house and sigh wistfully at the boys outside their window.
I would have to check statistics, but “19 or 20″ seems to be a bit on the high end. (“Sweet 16″ was “sweet” because she’s totally do-able now, boys!) And, of course, it doesn’t matter much if girls in the 60s and 70s wanted to get married or not, since most of the *boys* were off in some jungle spreading democracy.
But it’s totally liberals who ruined marriage. Totally!
unlike liberals, who encourage young teenagers to lick condoms and show their “orgasm faces” in front of a camera during mandatory “AIDS Awareness” presentations.)
Dang! I was unaware that sex had been ruined. You mean all this time it’s been broken or something?
What is Christian, 20 years old or something? How does he presume to know how women in the 50′s felt?
Oh, and I especially like this gem: “the prerequisites to getting married…..[include] having at least one abortion (and preferably a partial-birth one).”
Oh, yes, tra la la, we liberal women strongly prefer having to abort the miscarried body of our hydrocephalic brain-dead infants – it’s just an experience we wouldn’t miss!
Fucker. I am not a vengeful person, but I wish upon young Christian that he and his virginal future spouse will have to make an agonizing decision someday, and those fucking words will rise up in his pencil-necked esophagus to choke him.
What is Christian, 20 years old or something? How does he presume to know how women in the 50′s felt?
Oh, and I especially like this gem: “the prerequisites to getting married…..[include] having at least one abortion (and preferably a partial-birth one).”
Oh, yes, tra la la, we liberal women strongly prefer having to abort the miscarried body of our hydrocephalic brain-dead infants – it’s just an experience we wouldn’t miss!
Fucker. I am not a vengeful person, but I wish upon young Christian that he and his virginal future spouse will have to make an agonizing decision someday, and those fucking words will rise up in his pencil-necked esophagus to choke him.
Ooh, more punchlines to the “Christians are having the best sex on the planet” line:
“Which planet is he talking about?”
“Unfortunately, they’re not having it with their spouses.”
“Which Christians are the biggest animals in bed? The Episcopalians? The Baptists? The Lutherans? The Methodists? Is inter-denominational sex hotter? Tell us all, Hartsock!”
“Which planet is he talking about?”
“Unfortunately, they’re not having it with their spouses.”
“Which Christians are the biggest animals in bed? The Episcopalians? The Baptists? The Lutherans? The Methodists? Is inter-denominational sex hotter? Tell us all, Hartsock!”
g (comment #23), I doubt he has any idea what a partial birth abortion is. He doesn’t even comprehend that:
a.) “Christian” and “liberal” are not mutually exclusive. Many people are both.
b.) Liberals aren’t the only ones who have abortions (or premarital sex, for that matter)
c.) People in the ’50′s didn’t always wait until they were married to have sex. Shit, the Reagans didn’t even wait!
d.) Three words: Rush. Limbaugh. Viagra.
e.) “If You Leave Me Now” is a BREAKUP song. (Oh, and it came out in the ’70′s.)
I could go on listing all the ways Hartsock is an idiot, but I’d prefer to be in bed before midnight.
a.) “Christian” and “liberal” are not mutually exclusive. Many people are both.
b.) Liberals aren’t the only ones who have abortions (or premarital sex, for that matter)
c.) People in the ’50′s didn’t always wait until they were married to have sex. Shit, the Reagans didn’t even wait!
d.) Three words: Rush. Limbaugh. Viagra.
e.) “If You Leave Me Now” is a BREAKUP song. (Oh, and it came out in the ’70′s.)
I could go on listing all the ways Hartsock is an idiot, but I’d prefer to be in bed before midnight.
Baptists have the hottest sex, but never standing up. Someone might think they were dancing.
Today women are afraid of commitment. While they may have a soft spot for songs with lyrics like “If you leave me now, you’ll take away the biggest part of me” or “Michelle…I need you, I need you, I need you…,” if you yourself utter those words to a woman, she will accuse you of “overwhelming” or “suffocating” her and will immediately dash to open the nearest window and gasp for breath.
This is so true. That’s why I recommend the soulful stylings of Meat Loaf when I pick up women in the Dobson aisle of the Single Woman’s section in the local Logos Bookstore:
“I want you…”
[her feet grow cold; her eyes start to glaze over]
“I need you…”
[she starts frantically scanning for the nearest exit]
“But there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you…”
["Ooh, Baby!"]
This is so true. That’s why I recommend the soulful stylings of Meat Loaf when I pick up women in the Dobson aisle of the Single Woman’s section in the local Logos Bookstore:
“I want you…”
[her feet grow cold; her eyes start to glaze over]
“I need you…”
[she starts frantically scanning for the nearest exit]
“But there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you…”
["Ooh, Baby!"]
Utterly useless bit of trivia that I happen to know: “Two Out Of Three Ain’t Bad” was written as an “answer song” to Elvis Presley’s 50′s hit “I Want You, I Need You, I Love You”.
their insistence on fornicating with every fish in the sea…
Now it’s Fish Sex? What is it with wingnuts and their obsession with interspecies fornication?
Is that why they claim their sex lives are the best? Perhaps I’m missing out on something.
Now it’s Fish Sex? What is it with wingnuts and their obsession with interspecies fornication?
Is that why they claim their sex lives are the best? Perhaps I’m missing out on something.
Thank JEEBUS we have the example of such Republican Christian paragons of marriage and chastity like Rush Limbaugh (divorced 3 times, accidental Viagra spokesman), Newt Gingrich (3rd marriage, screwed around on the previous two) and Bob Dole (2nd marriage, cheated on fist wife), Ronald Reagan (divorced, first child born only 6 months after marriage), Pat Robertson (fist child born 6 months after marriage) not to mention the endless parade of Rethug officeholders busted for pedophilia and soliticting hookers. I guess they must all secretly be liberals.
Lil’ Innocent: I totally agree with you. It shows you that we have a long way to go. The 70′s tried, it was obvious that Gloria (All in the Family) and Mary Richards (Mary Tyler Moore) both had active sex lives and enjoyed it, yet they were still potrayed as intellegent and respectable women. But compare that to all the amoral, unlikeable sexualy active women (like Sex and the City) and it’s no wonder why sexually active women are looked down upon.
If only 20-year-old Christian
On behalf of my generation (I’m 23), we’re sorry — one day, we’ll get him laid so he’ll be cured of StickUpAssSmackTehBrain syndrome, but we’re working on Ben Shapiro (born in 1984)…we’re twentysomethings, not miracle workers!
Just how many generations since the 1950’s does Christian think there have been?
Well, let’s see…there’s the Father Knows Best generation, theOzzie and Harriet generation, the Leave It to Beaver generation…
((5 minutes later))
…the Growing Pains generation, the Full House generation. theStep By Step generation, the Home Improvement generation, and then came the Limbaugh babies, so I think that’s the EIB generation
Damn. Talk about your argument for devolution…
On behalf of my generation (I’m 23), we’re sorry — one day, we’ll get him laid so he’ll be cured of StickUpAssSmackTehBrain syndrome, but we’re working on Ben Shapiro (born in 1984)…we’re twentysomethings, not miracle workers!
Just how many generations since the 1950’s does Christian think there have been?
Well, let’s see…there’s the Father Knows Best generation, theOzzie and Harriet generation, the Leave It to Beaver generation…
((5 minutes later))
…the Growing Pains generation, the Full House generation. theStep By Step generation, the Home Improvement generation, and then came the Limbaugh babies, so I think that’s the EIB generation
Damn. Talk about your argument for devolution…
Make sure to blur out the All in the Family generation, the Anything Else Done by Norman Leer generation, the Married With Children Generation, the Simpsons generation, the anything on TV that doesn’t fit the Neo-Con ideal of “family” generation…
Jesus, Ben Shapiro was born the same year I was, and he’s a national columnist and I’m just a moocher.
And yet, somehow I don’t envy him in the least.
Also… we’re both vrigins with dorky hair. Wait… have I ever seen myself and him in the same room?!
Okay, this orgasm face thing… how do you KNOW what you look like when you have an orgasm? Did they glue mirrors to their partner’s foreheads? What’s the deal?
Lastly, I don’t get what Hartsock’s problem is. Yes, we’re ruining sex for ourselves, but how does what we do effect his sex? Is he claiming that no women are virgins, and so he’ll never have the hot ultra-sex he’s entitled to?
I mean, once I buy a vase I can smash the fuck out of it if I want to. Now, if it’s a one-of-a-kind piece of art then I guess you could argue that I’m taking it away from other people, but that relies on a somewat communistic idea that certain property is communally held.
Second, a vase is not a person; it has no agency. On the other hand, men and women who fuck before marriage choose to ruin not others, but themselves. It’s akin to a vase smashing itself. If it makes the vase happier to be in pieces, why should we begrudge it that?
In the same way, fucking Mr. Hartsock is not an obligation for women; it’s a choice.
Lastly, how does Christian know anything about how good sex after marriage is? I mean, he’s never had it. The people who have had it have never had any other sexual experiences to compare it to, so how do any of them knowwhich one is best?
And yet, somehow I don’t envy him in the least.
Also… we’re both vrigins with dorky hair. Wait… have I ever seen myself and him in the same room?!
Okay, this orgasm face thing… how do you KNOW what you look like when you have an orgasm? Did they glue mirrors to their partner’s foreheads? What’s the deal?
Lastly, I don’t get what Hartsock’s problem is. Yes, we’re ruining sex for ourselves, but how does what we do effect his sex? Is he claiming that no women are virgins, and so he’ll never have the hot ultra-sex he’s entitled to?
I mean, once I buy a vase I can smash the fuck out of it if I want to. Now, if it’s a one-of-a-kind piece of art then I guess you could argue that I’m taking it away from other people, but that relies on a somewat communistic idea that certain property is communally held.
Second, a vase is not a person; it has no agency. On the other hand, men and women who fuck before marriage choose to ruin not others, but themselves. It’s akin to a vase smashing itself. If it makes the vase happier to be in pieces, why should we begrudge it that?
In the same way, fucking Mr. Hartsock is not an obligation for women; it’s a choice.
Lastly, how does Christian know anything about how good sex after marriage is? I mean, he’s never had it. The people who have had it have never had any other sexual experiences to compare it to, so how do any of them knowwhich one is best?
Well I believe what the young master means when he says “Christians who are having the best sex right now out of anyone on the planet” is that they are having the only kind of sex you can have and NOT GO TO HELL WHEN YOU DIE!!! you Heathens!!
As for me, I’ll take a double dose of fornication with an extra heaping helping of debauchery……
As for me, I’ll take a double dose of fornication with an extra heaping helping of debauchery……
Hysterical Woman Says:
Women buried in couchs?
You met my first wife, I see…
Women buried in couchs?
You met my first wife, I see…
You give a baby a beautiful, shining glass vase and he’ll smash it on the floor. In the same way, God gave us marriage and sex and liberals have ruined both of those too.So, we libs smashed sex and marriage on teh floor? WTF?!?
“Michelle…I need you, I need you, I need you…,” if you yourself utter those words to a woman, she will accuse you of “overwhelming” or “suffocating” her and will immediately dash to open the nearest window and gasp for breath.Do I sense a restraining order in someone’s recent past? Inquiring minds want to know!
“Michelle…I need you, I need you, I need you…,” if you yourself utter those words to a woman, she will accuse you of “overwhelming” or “suffocating” her and will immediately dash to open the nearest window and gasp for breath.Oh, also? Her name is “Ronda,” asshat!
Well, I gave a baby a crystal vase once, and he didn’t pay it any attention at all. He was more interested in playing with the Tupperware and pan lids.
“In the 1950s, marriage was something women looked forward to, so much that they married at ages like 19 and 20…..To a woman, a man interested in commitment was the biggest turn-on. It was commitment that young women longed for.”
I am still curious how Christian is able to know what 19 or 20 year old women were thinking during the 1950′s. A woman who was 20 in 1955 would be 71 now. Heck, I’m curious whether he has ever had a conversation with a 71 year old woman – about any subject at all, let alone sex.
“In the 1950s, marriage was something women looked forward to, so much that they married at ages like 19 and 20…..To a woman, a man interested in commitment was the biggest turn-on. It was commitment that young women longed for.”
I am still curious how Christian is able to know what 19 or 20 year old women were thinking during the 1950′s. A woman who was 20 in 1955 would be 71 now. Heck, I’m curious whether he has ever had a conversation with a 71 year old woman – about any subject at all, let alone sex.
That shmuck is only 20 years old? So Christian Hartsock is nostalgic for a time in history when he wasn’t even born…and after reading his drivel, everybody else probably feels the same way.
Bill S: Why need experience on an era (like the 50′s) when you can use theme diners and Leave It to Beaver reruns as your guide?
Yaoi, I think you meant that comment for g (comment #39), not me. ‘Cause otherwise it’s a total non-sequiter to the joke I was attempting to make.
That shmuck is only 20 years old? So Christian Hartsock is nostalgic for a time in history when he wasn’t even born…and after reading his drivel, everybody else probably feels the same way.
DINGDINGDING!
We have a WINNER! lol
DINGDINGDING!
We have a WINNER! lol
I see everyone got on the Christian Hartsock train. I hadn’t realized you did it when I covered it myself, saying many of the same things.
The interesting thing about Christian is that he’s been claiming to be a filmmaker/screenwriter for about two years now, but I can’t find any finished shorts or films with his name attached to them. On his website he mentions a few ongoing projects, but we all know that person who is totally making this film and is totally almost done and of course it’s going to happen and blah blah blah, so that’s not worth that much.
Also his picture is worth a gander…better than Ben Shapiro, not quite as good as that guy who calls himself “the Dean.”
And I think he lives in or around Berkley, CA, which might mean his conservative parents keep him in a closet and only give him filtered web access, in which case he deserves some pity along with the scorn.
The interesting thing about Christian is that he’s been claiming to be a filmmaker/screenwriter for about two years now, but I can’t find any finished shorts or films with his name attached to them. On his website he mentions a few ongoing projects, but we all know that person who is totally making this film and is totally almost done and of course it’s going to happen and blah blah blah, so that’s not worth that much.
Also his picture is worth a gander…better than Ben Shapiro, not quite as good as that guy who calls himself “the Dean.”
And I think he lives in or around Berkley, CA, which might mean his conservative parents keep him in a closet and only give him filtered web access, in which case he deserves some pity along with the scorn.
Bill: I was just adding to the joke about Christian’s nostalgia for an era he experienced.
“not quite as good as that guy who calls himself “the Dean.””
No, you’re right. He is the best.
I just keep wishing “the Dean” would be blessed with the duties that actual Deans have to perform….you know, like shitty personnel decisions; nasty academic politics, schmoozing with demanding donors, etc.
No, you’re right. He is the best.
I just keep wishing “the Dean” would be blessed with the duties that actual Deans have to perform….you know, like shitty personnel decisions; nasty academic politics, schmoozing with demanding donors, etc.
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener…
The politics of the bedroom (via World O’ Crap) DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener #399: Christian Hartsock This is what feminism has done to women. It has demonized marriage, it has demolished prudence, and it has denigrated the concept of commitment. The onl…
The politics of the bedroom (via World O’ Crap) DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener #399: Christian Hartsock This is what feminism has done to women. It has demonized marriage, it has demolished prudence, and it has denigrated the concept of commitment. The onl…
YES, DING DING DING, WE HAVE A WIENER! If were only J*ffrey G*ldstein (G-d forbid!), I could slap Christian Hartsock with my dick. But since my genitalia is inboard–a fact for which the manly Mr. Biscuitbarrel has always been extremely grateful–perhaps I could sit young Mr. Hartsock down. Of course, I would curl up on the comfy chintz couch here at Casa Biscuitbarrel, near the electric fan, and for my guest we’d find one of those straight-backed chairs with the straps and the ball gag.
And I would tell young Windsock–Hartsock, sorry–all about what Us ’70s Gals thought about love and sex and marriage and communication and procreation, and what the previous generation of ladies told us as well. I have a pile of topical books that I’d be willing to read aloud to him, as long as he was firmly strapped in.
And I would tell young Windsock–Hartsock, sorry–all about what Us ’70s Gals thought about love and sex and marriage and communication and procreation, and what the previous generation of ladies told us as well. I have a pile of topical books that I’d be willing to read aloud to him, as long as he was firmly strapped in.
Ms Biscuitbarrel…
Windsock was more correct: he only gets stiff when he blows.
Windsock was more correct: he only gets stiff when he blows.
Heh heh heh… you said Hartsock…
Christian Hartsock–that can’t be a real person, can it? This is like a TV villain being named Evil Terrorist. Who dreamed up his name? I think he has been created by the godless liberal conspiracy to discredit conservatives. After all, what kind of dork would actually be this moronic . . . oh,yeah!
I was going say that Hartsock is an asshat, but I’m sure that joke has been made already.
Actor212: I like that. Thanks for the laugh.
I am still curious how Christian is able to know what 19 or 20 year old women were thinking during the 1950’s
Mother Avenger(Class of ’54 Notre Dame High School, San Jose, CA) always said that half her class got married because they wanted to know what sex was like, and that was the only way a ‘good Catholic’ girl could do so.
I’m surprised that they haven’t brought back the use of the word ‘pig’ to be used for any female having sex with someone other than her God/father-chosen sacred husband.
Mother Avenger(Class of ’54 Notre Dame High School, San Jose, CA) always said that half her class got married because they wanted to know what sex was like, and that was the only way a ‘good Catholic’ girl could do so.
I’m surprised that they haven’t brought back the use of the word ‘pig’ to be used for any female having sex with someone other than her God/father-chosen sacred husband.
“Christians are having the best sex of anyone on the planet.”
Undoubtedly true. Pulling rosary beads out of your ass, bead by bead, while licking the Blasted Virgin’s tuna (obligatory fish sex reference)casserole, and rubbin thy nubbin on the pipe organist’s crotchless bench, I’m sure your pews runneth over with Holy Jism, as that Ho’ Zonnah spaketh in tongues while twirling her divine sepulchres to the driving rhythms of Debbie Gibson at 78 rpm, and you know the Pharisees are envious of the groove moves your married priest trained you in during that awkward lull in the confessional after you bit his nipple, AMEN.
And to think, I was almost lured into kosher sex with Rabbi Schliemojo, where I’d have been condemned to the perpetual boredom of that stupid dredel-on-my-clitoris game.
Undoubtedly true. Pulling rosary beads out of your ass, bead by bead, while licking the Blasted Virgin’s tuna (obligatory fish sex reference)casserole, and rubbin thy nubbin on the pipe organist’s crotchless bench, I’m sure your pews runneth over with Holy Jism, as that Ho’ Zonnah spaketh in tongues while twirling her divine sepulchres to the driving rhythms of Debbie Gibson at 78 rpm, and you know the Pharisees are envious of the groove moves your married priest trained you in during that awkward lull in the confessional after you bit his nipple, AMEN.
And to think, I was almost lured into kosher sex with Rabbi Schliemojo, where I’d have been condemned to the perpetual boredom of that stupid dredel-on-my-clitoris game.
Tech98: do you have the video of this immaculate conception?
Pat Robertson (fist child born 6 months after marriage)
Pat Robertson (fist child born 6 months after marriage)
[...] S.Z. captures the raptures of Sluts ! [...]
Wow, someone more screwed up than Ben Shapiro. That’s a lot of screwed up!
The Dark Avenger: Don’t give them ideas (with the pig term). That’s sad that those girls are willing to jump into an unhappy marraige just to have sex.
It’s even sadder that, in 2006, there are still people in this country who believe every unmarried woman is either a virgin or a slut, with NOTHING in between.
So, a slut is basically a woman who has sex with lots of people, but unlike a whore, she does it for free.
Why, that’s not wickedness. That there is CHARITY, that is.
Anyway, I’m not a violent person by nature, but something about Debbie Schlussel (and Mike Adams, too, by the way) makes me feel really angry in that bar-brawl-startin’ kind of way. I think it’s the one-two punch of reprehensible and misogynistic statements combined with smarmy-asshole delivery.
On the other hand, I kind of think Christian and Ben should hook up. They’d make a great couple. As long as nobody has to watch.
Why, that’s not wickedness. That there is CHARITY, that is.
Anyway, I’m not a violent person by nature, but something about Debbie Schlussel (and Mike Adams, too, by the way) makes me feel really angry in that bar-brawl-startin’ kind of way. I think it’s the one-two punch of reprehensible and misogynistic statements combined with smarmy-asshole delivery.
On the other hand, I kind of think Christian and Ben should hook up. They’d make a great couple. As long as nobody has to watch.
Does anyone know if Fraulein Coulter gave a right-wing junior pundit seminar weekend in Wannssee, CT?
These talent-free, humorless and aggressively indecent pukes are proliferating faster than the pods in the Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
They all say the same shit with the same snarl.
These talent-free, humorless and aggressively indecent pukes are proliferating faster than the pods in the Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
They all say the same shit with the same snarl.
Jack of None: I think it’s because Debbie is like the post-high/middle school version of that phoney, miss perfect girl (think Tracy Flick from Election) only more evil, asexual, and arrogant. Michelle Mahn seems to make me want to punch as well. Probably cause they dive head-first and indulge in their arrogance.
A DREIDEL on the CLITORIS?!
Who knew?
Who knew?
I believe young Christian and all the other upright and uptight Cristians out there are probably are having the best sex EVER—imaginary sex. Way better than the real thing.
Cranqui: That reminds me of a strip on Ghastly’s Ghastly comic (about what fundies fantasize about, see the last pannel):http://www.ghastlycomic.com/d/20040418.htmlWARNING! Not work safe.
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