The World O' Crap Archive

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Friday, December 31, 2010

February 26, 2004 by s.z.

Frosted Mini-TownHalls

I'm really tired.  And the pundits aren't helping any, since they are all saying the same thing ("Mel Gibson's There's Something About Jesus is NOT anti-Semitic; and while it may be really violent, you never hear anyone saying we shouldn't let kids watch Reservoir Dogs.  Oh, and the FMA is not about discriminating against homosexuals, it's about standing up to uppity judges who want to cause the end of civilization as we know it.") 

But here's a representative sampling of today's TownHall.

Well, of COURSE women are going to get raped if they insist on playing football with men -- because rape is about violence, and football is also about violence.  The NFL players rape each other all the time.
There is a connection between the increasing disrespect shown to women in our society and an ultra-feminist ideology that pushes teenage girls to play a brutal contact sport with teenage boys.
Thus, it's the feminists' fault if women at the University of Colorado were raped -- because the feminists pushed for women to be included in unladylike sports, causing the young boys on the college team to think that all females were bitches who deserved to be assaulted.
A boy on a coed football squad -- or playing against a coed squad -- faces an irreconcilable conflict between his duty as a man and his duty as a player. As a man, he must never strike a woman. As a player he must strike teammates during scrimmages, and opposing players during games, fairly and within the rules but with all the force he can muster.
And once he learns how fun it is to tackle a woman, he will eventually became a rapist or serial killer (through no fault of his own), all because of his duty as a player.
Make no mistake: Any football player who rapes or assaults a woman should be tried, convicted and sent to prison. Any administrator or coach who turns a blind eye to immoral behavior by the students in his charge should be fired. But the ideologues that put girls on football fields must be held accountable, too. They are guilty of normalizing the use of force against women. 
Yup, the ideologues should go to jail along with the men who actually committed the assaults -- because if only Patricia Ireland hadn't encouraged girls to do manly things, then men wouldn't have acquired all that rage against women that can only be expressed through rape.

Emmet isn't going to see The Passion of the Christ because it's a fantasy.  But he will go see The Affair of the Kerry, because that one is true.
Well whether or not Kerry had a Francois Mitterrand-like relationship with a cutie, he still seems very Gallic to me. Now it turns out he has a cousin who is mayor of a small French town. Mon Dieu, how French is that? Oh, and by the way, did I hear that he served in Vietnam?  
James Taranto, the wit who edits Opinion, has been having a grand old time teasing Kerry about his chest-beating boasts of service in Vietnam. This past week, reports have begun to surface that the senator's boasts might be highly exaggerated. It appears he only served four more months in Vietnam than the 90 percent of the men of his generation who did not serve there at all.  
When you steal material from James Taranto, the puffy-looking blogger who hasn't had an original thought since 1982, you know you're in trouble.  Oh, and by the way, did I hear that Taranto is a wit?  I didn't thnk so.

And we must point out that this week, reports have begun to surface that Kerry served in Vietnam four months more than Emmett, who too was busy founding The American Spectator to actually serve in the military or do anything constructive with his life.  And while Kerry heroically saved the life of at least one person, Emmett did head the "Arkansas Project," dedicated to exposing the truth about Bill Clinton's heroin dealing and murder of Vince Foster, so he deserves a Silver Star too.

If we legalize gay marriage, then every single aspect of our society will change for the worse, and we might has well just kill ourselves and our children.
A recent Winston Group poll circulated by the Alliance for Marriage (which opposes same-sex marriage) asked Americans if they support a constitutional amendment to define marriage as the union of a man and a woman. Sixty-one percent said yes.  
In what amounts to a bit of interesting push-polling, the pollsters next asked: "If gay marriage were made legal and schools were then required to change their curriculum to treat gay marriages in the same manner as traditional marriages, would you favor or oppose gay marriage?"
Opposition jumped to 69 percent, with just 24 percent of Americans favoring single-sex marriage.
And then the Alliance for Marriage asked those polled, "If gay marriage was made legal, and so the government mandated that your son marry Michael Jackson, and your daughter marry Janet Jackson in a topless Super Bowl half-time black mass involving the slaughter of 100 innocent puppies, would you favor or oppose gay marriage?"

Then 92 percent of respondents opposed it.     
I call it a "push-poll," yet it accurately describes just one of many consequences of gay marriage: Home economics classes, abstinence education, marriage and family life courses, even teen pregnancy prevention courses - 
 . . .children's coloring books, Mother's Day cards, Gnat Lileks' lisping utterances, the Catholic Mass, the Morning Farm Report . . .
- anywhere the word "marriage" is used in public schools, the new unisex version of marriage could be pushed.
Well, you do have to admit that gay marriage is one way to prevent teen pregnancy.

John Kerry is no hero, maybe.  You know how he got a Silver Star for leaping off his boat to kill a Vietnamese soldier who suddenly popped up?  Well, the solider might have been dying anyway, some guy says; Gary's FBI training in hydro-shock confirms it. 

Plus, some old guys told Gary that only wimps put in for Purple Hearts, since applying for medals took soliders away from killing commies for a few hours.  You know, Gary could have had dozens of Purple Hearts if he had wanted them, and had served in Vietnam and been wounded dozens of times. 

Oh, and maybe John Kerry was attending anti-war rallies with Jane Fonda while he was supposed to be in Vietnam!  It could have happened, you know.
Did Kerry take leave-time to attend these rallies, or was he AWOL from his post while he traveled around protesting the war?
Did he only participate in peaceful war protests, or did he join the Hard-Left, anti-US, pro-Communistic cabal of Tom Hayden, Jane Fonda and other well-known Hard-Left anti-US radicals?
Did he join the Black Panthers?  Was he one of the Weathermen who blew up that townhouse in New York?  Did he kidnap Patty Hearst?
I don’t know the answers to these questions, but I do know where to find them.  Every significant leader of any anti-war, anti-US protest from the 1960’s has a large file sitting in a file drawer over at the FBI Headquarters.
Then, like President Bush, Senator Kerry could release his FBI file to the media. 
You go first, Gary -- ask to have your FBI personnel file released to the media.  I guarantee it would make fascinating reading; plus, it would help us to determine if you are crazy or not.  (Because while blaming Kerry because a White House with something to hide released Bush's dental records is kind of crazy, it's possible that Gary's FBI medical records could help us better understand his pathological jealousy of men who remind him of the jocks who got all the girls in high school.) 

Anyway, Gary isn't leaving it at telling Kerry about the existance of his FBI file; no, he's forming a committee called, “Americans for Truth About Kerry,” to "assist and encourage" Kerry to release his file to the media.  You know, so that Gary can do for Kerry what he did for the Clintons: smear him.  What a patriot and a hero!

Chuck is calling upon everyone to thank the President for "his courageous stand" for the FMA, because there has never been an issue "as important for Christians as this," since the FMA "has to do with protecting the most fundamental institution of human life."  For if homosexuals are allowed to marry, then all life on Earth will cease!
The president’s support is crucially important for several reasons. First, it adds muscle to the long struggle required to amend the Constitution. Second, he’s defending the family. The attack on marriage is an assault on the family, the most basic building block of human culture.  
Yes, the family is vital.  As Chuck once said, "I would walk over my grandmother if necessary to assure the President's reelection."  (Of course, that was when he was a "hatchetman," before he went to prison and found Jesus.  And besides, his grandmother wasn't CLOSE family.) 
Anyway, enough TownHall for today.  More blogging later.

6:40:51 AM

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