Giving America Choices And with refreshing modesty, Jonah directs us to Right Wing News, and a post in which John Hawkins says it's okay for conservatives to criticize Bush (guys, it IS okay -- trust me on this). Hawkins heads off those who would say, "But Hawkins, but Hawkins, you guys voted for him. So it's like you endorsed his agenda," with the following:
So, my question to you is: if you were a conservative, and these were your presidential choices, who would YOU pick?   1. Tom Delay 2. Jonah Goldberg   3. Thomas "kidney" Sowell  4. George Bush   5. Kodos 2:01:46 PM  |
Yes, voters, here are your choices for President: (1) George W. Bush, a fiscally-responsible guy who just proposed a 2.4 trillion budget which doesn't include any funding for keeping the troops in Afghanistan and Iraq -- see, that's what makes him fiscally-responsible: the old "second-set-of-books" accounting method! And Bush is also the one who will fight the War on Terror, and Protect the Homeland -- but only from our official terrorist enemies: brown-skinned foreigners. (See David Niewert's Orcinus article "Ricin attack: What homeland security?" to learn that the ricin in the Senate mailroom, which Frist called "terrorism" a couple of days ago, is no longer terrorism, now that it appears that Saddam and al Qaeda weren't actually involved in the incident.) Oh, and Bush is positive! (2) A Democrat like John Kerry, who blocked legislation and accepted "related special interest money." Does this mean that Kerry was BOUGHT BY SPECIAL INTEREST GROUP??? Well, that's what it sounds like, doesn't it? Say no more, say no more. And Kerry is also shockingly unkind. While one (well, Ed) expected Kerry to talk about ("distort for political expediency") his record as a war hero, no one expected some kind of Spanish Inquisition about Bush's war record!!! Kerry even disparged the National Guard, a group of hard-working Americans to which you or your loved ones might belong. In fact, when you follow the link ("Kerry and Terry Insult National Guard"), to the GOP Team Leader site, you learn that Kerry said this:
So, Kerry didn't actually insult the Guard, he just said that if someone (Bush, say) served in the Guard instead of going to 'Nam, it was "their choice," and he's "never raised that as an issue." Interestingly enough, the Team Leader quotes page doesn't provide you with the two paragraphs from the Boston Herald story which precede the part where Kerry "insults" the Guard:
Thus we see that wasn't saying that Bush was a coward for choosing to serve in the Guard, he was saying that Bush made the choice to serve in the Guard (and then apparently failed to report for duty), and that Kerry hasn't decided whether or not to make an issue of that. (You can see why the RNC wouldn't quote that part: not only because it helps to invalidate their "insult" interpretation, but because they don't want to remind anybody about that "failure to report for several months" business). While Kerry didn't say it, I think the case can be made that the "draft dodgers" actually took a more honorable course than Bush did, because they didn't make committments they failed to honor, and then later claim they were war heroes, 'cause they learned to fly fighter jets and stuff. Anyway, here are the rest of the Team Leader quotes which show Kerry (and DNC Chairman Terry McAuliffe) insulting the Guard:
So, see? If anybody says that Bush didn't serve our country (because he was AWOL), they are actually saying that the National Guard is a bunch of cowards and deserters! Kerry and McAuliffe are insulting YOU, Mr. and Mrs. America!
The Republicans (and Bush) HONOR these brave Americans. Unlike the Democrats, who spit in their faces! Because if anyone questions Bush's service (or lack thereof) in the Texas National Guard, this person is insulting those reservists in Iraq who are protecting your freedom! This person is, in effect, an AL QAEDA SYMPATHIZER! So, who do YOU want as your President: a hero like Bush (who also believes in giving you, the hard-working American, a tax cut), or Kerry, a known terrorist? Oh, and the Democrats are the negative guys, and you don't want to vote for that mean-spirited stuff, do you? Right now you are probably asking yourself, "What else can I do to help President Bush's agenda as a Team Leader?" (Well, you didn't know that HAD an agenda as a Team Leader, but you still want to help, right?) So, here are some ways:
Yes, the Republican Party is rather like Amway. Thanks for asking.
While that does sound way cool, unfortunately the link provided doesn't say anything about how to do it. So, instead I will share with you some Team Leader posts on the topic "Why I Am a Republican":
This last guy is clearly no Republican, because the ideology actually reads, "If you give someone a handout, he will blow it on drugs, booze, and abortions; but if you let someone earn, through honest hard work, a vocational education at a community college, he will be able to feed his family for a long time, and then his job will be outsourced to India, because that's how the free market works." And here is the last way you can help Bush's agenda:
Here we see President Bush doing his part to register Republican voters. Sure, young Paco demurs, telling Bush that he's an illegal alien, and is also only 7-years-old. But Bush, the positive guy, says none of that matters, as long as Paco registers as a Republican. Oh, and apparently Paco is dead, and Bush is in heaven, trying to register young ball players, which really shows Bush's depth of committment. So, get cracking on helping Bush's Team Leader agenda! This is no place for loafers. Join me or die! Can you do any less? 12:06:55 AM |
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