The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

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Tuesday, February 1, 2011

More Things You Probably Didn't Know

Amazing Fact #3: Darwin Was Responsible for the Holocaust  

Here’s part of the Christian World News report:
Christian experts will be unraveling the truth about Darwinism in a television special airing this weekend. “Darwin’s Deadly Legacy” will give a shocking look at the historical impact of the theory that has been in school books for generations.
One of the shocking connections the documentary presents is how natural selection, or “survival of the fittest,” was a “guiding idea” for Hitler and the Nazis.
Dr. D. James Kennedy, senior pastor of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church, simply put it, “No Darwin, no Hitler.”
Elaborating on that connection, Ham stated that Hitler used evolution to justify what he did with the Jews or “cleaning up the gene pool,” as the experts called it.
Denouncing Coral Ridge Ministries for making such a link, Anti-Defamation League called it “twisted.”
Yeah, but you have to be pretty twisted if you want to compete with Ann Coulter. (Ann, who also appears on the program, reportedly claims that Darwinism is popular “because it allows atheists not to have to explain why we’re here.” Of course, Ann knows that we are here to invade, kill, and convert; persecute Clintons; and defame liberals.)
But back to the news story:
The 60-minute special will feature Coulter; Richard Weikart, author of From Darwin to Hitler; Lee Strobel, author of The Case for a Creator; Jonathan Wells, author of Icons of Evolution; and other experts.
Yes, apparently Ann is an expert on both Christianity AND science, which is why she is scientifically qualified to trash the whole theory of evolution.
“We keep hearing that there are gaps in the theory [of evolution]. The whole theory is a gap,” she said.
And Ann has the Lexis-Nexis searches to prove her claims (they’re in her footnotes). 
Besides, Darwin was just so gosh-darned evil (you might remember him from that “Star Trek” episode where he murdered Abraham Lincoln with a spear) that we should reject any theory that he came up with, just on general principles. 

Amazing Fact #4: That Zoo Horse Wasn’t Really Named After Ann Coulter 

This item is for Michelle Malkin, who was very upset at the way a SF Chronicle reporter “slimed” Ann Coulter. (Michelle, actually Ann was slimy long before the Chronicle story came out.)

Anyway, Michelle found it deplorable that somebody would make fun of another person that way (and because she’s so fair and balanced, we’re sure she’ll devote equal time to the incident that TBogg mentioned).
But for now, we want to reassure her that despite what the Chronicle implied, that horse at the SF zoo wasn’t named for Ann.  Editor & Reporter has the story:
A posting at, the San Francisco Chronicle’s popular Web site, earlier this week suggested that a horse named Coulter at the city’s zoo was named after a certain well-known columnist.
After all, the zoo has an eagle, Stephen Jr., that supposedly honors Comedy Central’s Stephen Colbert, and the horse, the writer claimed, bore a striking resemblance to Ann Coulter (skinny legs, blonde hair, etc.)
Well, it was a good rumor, anyway.
A letter to E&P by Alexander Winslow, public relations manager of the San Francisco Zoo, clears that up:
“Thank you for your interest in Coulter, the San Francisco Zoo’s American Cream draft horse. Coulter lives a happy life on the Family Farm at the San Francisco Zoo’s Children Zoo. He’s a gentle creature who loves people. He also loves Timothy hay, high-fiber pellets, apples, and carrots. He’s also quite smart.”
So, obviously he bears little resemblance to Ann, who doesn’t live a happy life, could never be described as gentle, hates people, hates all kinds of food (especially high-fiber pellets), and isn’t very smart.
We’re sure the Chronicle reporter regrets his error. 

Amazing Fact #5: Mark Steyn Has Finally Realized He’s Not an American

Or maybe his publisher did.  In any case, Mark’s upcoming book (which has been upcoming for over two years now) is no longer called America Alone: Our Country’s Future as a Lone Warrior, but instead America Alone: The End of the World as We Know It.  

(Here’s a tip for Regnery: your new title is better than America Alone: Mark Steyn is Really a Canadian, but not as good America Alone: It’s the End of the World as We Know It, and Mark Steyn Feels Fine.)

Anyway, here’s some scary and/or hilarious info from Regnery about Mark’s rather stale tome:
From the Inside Flap
It’s the end of the world as we know it… Someday soon, you might wake up to the call to prayer from a muezzin. Europeans already are.
And liberals will still tell you that “diversity is our strength”—while Talibanic enforcers cruise Greenwich Village burning books and barber shops, the Supreme Court decides sharia law doesn’t violate the “separation of church and state,” and the Hollywood Left decides to give up on gay rights in favor of the much safer charms of polygamy.
And Kevin Costner will deliver the mail and drink his own urine, the Morlocks will try to eat your flesh, all while Robot Monsters try to mate with your nubile blonde daughter.  Take that, liberals!
If you think this can’t happen, you haven’t been paying attention, as the hilarious, provocative, and brilliant Mark Steyn—the most popular conservative columnist in the English-speaking world—shows to devastating effect in this, his first and eagerly awaited new book on American and global politics.
Yeah, it’s been so eagerly awaited that its publication date has been pushed back nineteen months.
And if Steyn is the most popular conservative columnist in the English-speaking world, then the terrorists have already won, and we might as well let the robots turn us all into air slaves.
The future, as Steyn shows, belongs to the fecund and the confident. And the Islamists are both, while the West—wedded to a multiculturalism that undercuts its own confidence, a welfare state that nudges it toward sloth and self-indulgence, and a childlessness that consigns it to oblivion—is looking ever more like the ruins of a civilization.
Maybe the cats will be our heirs.  After all, they’re very fecund (ask me about their fecundity!), and more confident than even Steyn.  Plus, they are way more attractive than he is, and rarely write annoying columns.
Europe, laments Steyn, is almost certainly a goner. The future, if the West has one, belongs to America alone—with maybe its cousins in brave Australia.
Sorry, Canada.  I guess you were consigned to the rubbish heap of history along with Europe because of your damned diversity (you should have known better than to let the Quebecois speak French).
But America can survive, prosper, and defend its freedom only if it continues to believe in itself, in the sturdier virtues of self-reliance (not government), in the centrality of family, and in the conviction that our country really is the world’s last best hope.
Keep watching the Steyns, America!  And remember, you are way better than everybody else, especially those crappy Canadians!!

29 Responses to “More Things You Probably Didn’t Know”

“Europe, laments Steyn, is almost certainly a goner. The future, if the West has one, belongs to America alone—with maybe its cousins in brave Australia.”
–Regenery Publishing
“When my family arrived in this country four months ago, we spoke no English and had no money in our pockets.Today, we own a nationwide chain of wheel-balancing centers. Where else but in America, or possibly Canada, could our family find such opportunity?”
– Trong Van Din, Simpsons episode “Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington”
Hey, if you think we’re sharing the future with the fucking Seppos, you’ve got another think coming, cobber!
That Darwin prog sounds like it was fun. Apparently it includes material from human genome project director Francis Collins, who has since claimed he was duped into appearing, and is
“absolutely appalled by what Coral Ridge Ministries is doing. I had NO knowledge that Coral Ridge Ministries was planning a TV special on Darwin and Hitler, and I find the thesis of Dr. Kennedy’s program utterly misguided and inflammatory.”
It’s always seemed to me that the folks who feel we were (some of us) created in God’s Image are the ones who most likely think it would be a good idea to eliminate the ones who apparently weren’t.
And Mark’s right. Because, you know, the White House has already started eliminating the wall between Church and State, and I imagine they won’t balk when it becomes Mosque and State. I mean, unless they’re, you know, racist bigots who only want *their* religion endorsed by the state.
And all of us liberals sure are tolerant of “God Hates Fags” demonstrations, so you can assume we will wholeheartedly embrace roving imams set on closing down gay bookstores.
But for some reason my mind keeps circling the “Secular liberals want to kill us all with diversity” theme back on the “Hitler’s attempts at destroying everyone he didn’t like were motivated by secular liberal ideas like evolution” theme, and I start to wonder if maybe these guys are, you know, a little tiny bit illogical.
A tiny bit? You’re generous, D. Sidhe. If these fuckwits were created in God’s image, He must be using a fun-house mirror. Or heavy drugs.
Oh, and is “air slave” anything like “air guitar”? ‘Cause I could probably live with that if. :)

‘if that’s the case’ I meant to write, but erased all but the ‘if’. Me so genuis am.
Kennedy is completely right. Darwin’s describing how natural selection operates on a wide array of biological diversity is obviously responsible for Hitler’s desire to narrow the gene pool through artificial selection. That is why former President Gerald Ford was able to sue Isaac Newton for making him fall down those stairs.
Oh, my favorite phrase is “sturdier virtues of self-reliance,” coming from people who live off of family money and/or right-wing slush funds. If they actually had to rely on their own wonderful selves, they’d be living in cardboard boxes and ranting on street corners.
…a welfare state that nudges it toward sloth and self-indulgence…
And it is not, I repeat not, self-indulgent to write a rabid, uninformed screed about how everyone who doesn’t share your exact worldview is destroying western civilization.
But America can survive, prosper, and defend its freedom only if it continues to believe in itself, in the sturdier virtues of self-reliance (not government)
We must defend our nation ourselves with deer rifles and cherry bombs, instead of relying on government institutions like the military.
(Here’s a tip for Regnery: your new title is better than America Alone: Mark Steyn is Really a Canadian, but not as good America Alone: It’s the End of the World as We Know It, and Mark Steyn Feels Fine.)
I suggest I, Fucknozzle.
The future, as Steyn shows, belongs to the fecund and the confident.
Doctor Steynlove, you mentioned the ratio of ten women to each man. Now, wouldn’t that necessitate the abandonment of the so-called monogamous sexual relationship, I mean, as far as men were concerned?
Regrettably, yes. But it is, you know, a sacrifice required for the future of the human race. I hasten to add that since each man will be required to do prodigious… service along these lines, the women will have to be selected for their sexual characteristics which will have to be of a highly stimulating nature.
Damn cookies! That wasn’t Her Royal Highness making the last comment.
That is why former President Gerald Ford was able to sue Isaac Newton for making him fall down those stairs.
Still laughing over this.
Western Civilization is dying, says Mark Steyn! And what does he prescribe that we do about this? Do we join the military and fight? Do we try to become energy-independent? Do we reach out to our allies? No way! We “believe.” As long as we believe in the proper things, apparently history will take care of itself. Sheer wingnut brilliance!
I must admit that I’m not very optimistic for a Western Civilization where anybody respects someone like Mark Steyn.
Ann SHOULD add more fiber to her diet-maybe then she wouldn’t be so full of shit.
Oh, but you missed the best part!
When the good people at Pandagon covered Kennedy’s “documentary”, they included the following Coulter quote:
“I never knew about the link between Darwin and Hitler until after reading Richard Weikart’s book. [Hitler] was applying Darwinism. He thought the Aryans were the fittest and he was just hurrying natural selection along.”
I was stunned that even Coulter could be that historically illiterate.
OTOH, Coulter is a male… and so is Coulter!
Amazing Fact #4: That Zoo Horse Wasn’t Really Named After Ann Coulter
well, they didn’t want to confuse the poor horse by just naming it’s nether regions
but not as good America Alone: It’s the End of the World as We Know It, and Mark Steyn Feels Fine.)
shouldn’t that be “America Alone: It’s the End of the World as We Know It, And I Feel Steyn.”
What a perfect measure of thirty years of (the latest political incarnation of ) Creation science–they’re reduced to playing the Hitler card and to having Coulter as their celebrity pitchman. Thirty years and they couldn’t even convince Dennis Miller. Thirty years, untold millions poured into the Discovery Institute and its predecessors, not a single paper offered for peer-review, let alone accepted, not even a proposal for future research. Thirty years. Thirty years ago the first build-it-yourself home computer hit the market from Heathkit. VHS was introduced, a year after the Sony Betamax. Less than 20% of the country was wired for cable teevee. Nobody had a cordless phone and few people had home answering machines. If you tore your ACL you didn’t play football again, and you limped through life with a 12″ surgical scar. The Human Genome Project would not begin for another decade.
Quite a proud record of accomplishment.
Steyn is a canadian name?
Several years ago i was confronted by candian customs with 12 inch plexiglass tube found in my car trunk. I told them it was a penis pump and they let me go.
We are probably all safer now.
Y’know, nothing in the letter from the zoo guy that that you quoted disproves the statement that the horse was named after Ann Coulter. All Malkin is really saying in quoting it is that they supposedly are nothing alike. And how did Malkin let this get by?…: She interprets a statement that the horse is a nice horsey as meaning that he has nothing in common with Ann. Clearly her subconscious was working the keyboard when she wrote that.
Of course, the rest of that column might bear out the headline, but I can’t stand to go over there. Maybe later, after my three-martini lunch.
Only three? You’re being generous, Lucy.
*hic* I’d go read Malkin now but my fingershh don’t sheem to be working right…
Three observations in no particular order:
1. Who is the most fecund, confident man in the country? WARREN JEFFS! Leave it to all of you to apply Steyn’s theory to this data and compute the result.
2. Will the TV special show how prior to Darwin all of northern Europe was peaceful and Jew-hating didn’t exist? Hitler used Darwin to give fake legitimacy to something he was going to do anyway, akin to the way Bartholomew (#3 above) says Francis Collins was used. Hitler needed someone or something external to vent his and his country’s impotent rage on, and the Jews were handy, Darwin or no Darwin. (See Alice Miller, “For Your Own Good.”) Torquemada did the same with the Jews in Spain a few centuries earlier; Pilgrims used witches, real and imaginary; Caesar used the Celts a millenium or so before that. Etc., etc., etc.
These wingnuts use liberals and Muslims for the same purpose in their silly little war of words. It’s a story as old as all mankind, and maybe in a way it’s proof that–sadly–we haven’t evolved one bit after all.

3. Both Coulters produce the same thing all day: Happy Horseshit.
“the hilarious, provocative, and brilliant Mark Steyn”
I’ll give you the hilarious, though of the unintentional variety.

It is curious that the increasingly frequent screeds about Darwin’s connection to the holocaust always fail to mention that the Nazi’s ideas on race were influenced by the American eugenics movement which was led by the Harriman family.
Prescott Bush’s bestest buddies, to which the Bush family owes their subsequent wealth and status, were the Harriman brothers, Averell and Bunny. The Brown Brothers Harriman Consortium, to which all three belonged, was intimately involved in financing the Reich and complicit with the holocaust, but somehow the right wingers who bang on about Darwin manage never to mention that connection.
“My feelings as a Christian points me to my Lord and Savior as a fighter. It points me to the man who once in loneliness, surrounded only by a few followers, recognized these Jews for what they were and summoned men to fight against them…. When I go out in the morning and see these men standing in their queues and look into their pinched faces, then I believe I would be no Christian, but a very devil if I felt no pity for them, if I did not, as did our Lord two thousand years ago, turn against those by whom to-day this poor people is plundered and exploited.”
- Adolf Hitler, 12 April 1922

“The Catholic Church considered the Jews pestilent for fifteen hundred years, put them in ghettos, etc, because it recognized the Jews for what they were”…. I recognize the representatives of this race as pestilent for the state and for the church and perhaps I am thereby doing Christianity a great service by pushing them out of schools and public functions.”
- Adolf Hitler, 26 April 1933

Damn that Darwin, anyway!
while Talibanic enforcers cruise Greenwich Village
And if you’ve never been cruised by a Talibanic enforcer, you’ve never really been cruised.
Europe, laments Steyn, is almost certainly a goner. The future, if the West has one, belongs to America alone—with maybe its cousins in brave Australia.
Hey, how’s the US dollar done against the Euro since it was introduced?

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