The World O' Crap Archive

Welcome to the Collected World O' Crap, a comprehensive library of posts from the original Salon Blog, and our successor site, (2006 to 2010).

Current posts can be found here.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Today's Winner of the Ann Coulter "Racial Profiling Rulz!" Award

Our Ann Coulter wannabe for today is the low-budget David Limbaugh, Mike Gallagher   We join his rant already in progress:
So when I calmly suggested that there be a “Muslims Only” line at security checkpoints in our airports, ["ACLU shill" Michael] Gross, predictably, almost became unhinged. However, he was probably restrained from losing his senses altogether because of the thunderous applause my suggestion received from the studio audience on Fox’s “Dayside.”
To quote Ann Coulter, “My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not blow up a taping of Fox’s ‘Dayside’” 

Now, for the thrilling conclusion of Mike’s cunning plan:
Let’s stop playing politically correct games and being worried about what the ACLU is going to do. This isn’t some charade, this war is real. The terrorists who want to kill us are looking for every opportunity to pounce. It’s time to formally and officially launch profiling in our nation’s airports.As I often say, not all Muslims are terrorists. But all the terrorists are Muslims. 
And as I often say, not all Gallaghers are tedious buffoons who are routinely outwitted by watermelons, but this one is.

12 Responses to “Today’s Winner of the Ann Coulter “Racial Profiling Rulz!” Award”

God, I loathe that “but all terrorists are Muslims” thing. Timothy McVeigh, anyone? Eric Rudolph? The Unabomber??

It’s pretty obvious what Mike’s trying to say. “All terrorists are Arabs”. I assume this is ignorance on his part, that he doesn’t know that all Arabs aren’t Muslims and all Muslims are Arabs, but that you also can’t profile based on religion unless you can make people wear, say, little badges sewn onto all their clothes.

Why be PC, Mike? You want to profile brown people, say it.

Aside from which, there’s absolutely no strategic advantage to telling the world, essentially, that there are people we *will* screen and people we *won’t*, and here’s what the ones we’ll ignore look like.

How dumb do you have to be to not know that they’ll just start recruiting the “non-screenables”? John Walker Lindh wouldn’t have been profiled, kids.

You, Gallagher. STFU until you have any ideas that are more intelligent than *paint*. 
Left by D. Sidhe on August 18th, 2006
I don’t think I’ve read such a clear distillation of barely controlled hysteria up till now. This Gallagher is coming from a viewpoint that presupposes we know exactly who every terrorist is (and, gee, wouldn’t it be handy if we did? It would be Game Over) and can methodically screen for them. “You Muslims, get in this line so we can cavity-search you and check out your backgrounds. Once you’ve passed, we will be 100% safe! Hooray!” He wishes so fervently and desperately that this is true that his simple formula seems logical to him. It’s quite pathetic.
D.Sidhe, not to mention the white American men (a white supremacist man and a boy, separate incidents) in the last few years who actually were caught with “weapons of mass destruction” and homemade bombs, and given relatively light sentences of about 10 years, which the right wing never talks about and the media failed to go ballistic over. See Digby’s posts over the last day or so.
You ever get the feeling, Lucy, that they really do think it’s better to be killed by white Americans than anyone else? That seems to be the rationale on display in Iraq, too.
Yes, you have a point there. White murderers are the best murderin’ folk there is/Better to be killed in the name of a white person’s cause than a brown person’s cause? I can’t shake the strange feeling, though, that their paranoia regarding Islam really makes them blind to equal threats from elsewhere. Because if the vigorous, single-minded pursuit of quashing the “evil death-cult” of Islam once and for all won’t make them safe, then things are a hell of a lot more complicated than they’re comfortable with.
Given the choice, rather than being blown up by some sweaty third world guy reeking of garlic and garbanzo beans shouting religious slogans in some language I don’t understand, I’d much rather be squeezed to death between Lucy Lawless’ creamy white thighs…
Question: Will they include the Irish in their profiling?
I’d much rather be squeezed to death between Lucy Lawless’ creamy white thighs…
Dammit…and the antifungal cream had JUST started working….
I suppose that mister Gallagher would be fine with allowing brown-skinned Christians, Hindus, Ba’hai, Jews, animists, Shinto, Buddhists, and, yes, atheists to sue our government’s ass when they are mistakenly herded into the “Muslims Only” line at the airport and “thoroughly” searched. or would he be willing to name it more accurately, “Brown People Only” line? Sidhe’s right–if they did this (successfully!), the terrorist lords would just start recruiting more JW Lindh-types, as well as some disgruntled brothers from Nation of Islam (unless the quite dark skinned go in with the lighter brown varieties). So, whaddya do then?
I’d much rather be squeezed to death between Lucy Lawless’ creamy white thighs…
Yeah, okay. I could go for that. On the other hand, I’ve seen a lot of non-white people I could fill into that spot, too. I’m not a picky woman.
Like I always* say, “I look good in black–and black looks good in me!”
*every once in a great while.
Mike Gallagher: As I often say, not all Muslims are terrorists. But all the terrorists are Muslims.
Except for the ones called “Gallagher”.
and here
for example.

No comments:

Post a Comment