November 2, 2004 by s.z.

Election Day Carnival of the Winghuts Today's wingnut theme is: Vote for Bush or Osama wins, you will be killed, and your children will be forced to be hippies. 1.  Let's hear first from Judson Cox (whose Renew America bio still says that he's a "college student," even though he apparently hasn't re-enrolled in an institute of higher learning after dropping out of that traitorous, terroristic one that was going to show Fahrenheit 9/11).  His column is about how bin Laden made that video tape because he wants us to vote for Kerry -- so we have to spite Osama by voting for Bush. So long as we vote the right way, and live by bin Laden's rules, we'll be secure. Surely, all America is about to convert to Islam, put our women in burkas, mutilate their gentiles and place them under house arrest, stone all of our homosexuals, cut the tongues out of all who dissent, fill our prisons with children, burn all books that do not support radical Islam and exterminate the Jews!  If we do all of this, and elect a weak president who will bow at the alter of Islamic terrorism, bin Laden will leave us alone. I admit I included this bit from Judson because I feel he's on to something about how we women must stand up to bin Laden and not let him mutilate our gentiles. 2.  Amber Pawlik is back, and World O'Crap has her!  (Sorry, Sadly, No! and The Dark Window).  Her column is also how we have to vote for Bush to get back at Osama -- and at the Democrats, who are just as bad. I wish I could write about this upcoming election, “Regardless who wins or loses, keep in mind our real enemy is Islamic terrorists.”  The fact is this is not true.  Our enemy now is Islamic terrorists and those in America who want to see us destroyed.  The enemy is now (a) Islamic terrorists, and (b) everybody in the world who won't vote for George Bush.  See how much clearer and neater things are under Bush than they were under Clinton? This upcoming election is the difference between a man who will fight the terrorists and a man who will appease them.  John Kerry already has a track record of meeting with American enemies.  As opposed to George Bush, who has a track record of not meeting with American enemies because diplomacy is for sissies who can talk and speak at the same time. He represents a voter base of people who either don’t care about terrorism or sympathize with terrorists.   Doesn't Amber's argument make you want to change your vote? George Bush on the other hand has prevented attacks on the United States, reducing terrorists to doing nothing but making tapes and threats against us.  This election is of massive importance for the future of our world.  I am pleading with you as a girlfriend, daughter, sister and friend: please make the right decision.    Well, since Amber is a girlfriend, I guess we have no choice but to do as she says. 3.   Now, here's Karen Pittman explaining that George Bush has a character, so we must vote for him. Author's Endorsement: If you believe as I do that President Bush has worked hard since 9/11 to defend you and your family, tell him so by voting for him.  Recall the horror of that tragic day and reflect on this good man’s genuine travail.   Okay, we recall the horror of 9/11, we reflect how George has worked really hard (presumably after 9/11, because he was on vacation for most of the time before it), and then we are obligated to vote for him.  Because it's the EFFORT that counts, not the results. And then we are supposed to reflect how John Kerry says that he can do a better job than George Bush, and we are supposed to not vote for him, because apparently he has big black mustache and steals corn chips. This man is the Frito Bandito of political discourse.  George Bush, of course, is the Trix bunny of political discourse.  4.  Robin Mullins Boyd, a new GOPUSA pundit, is an RN from Georgia.  Her column is about how you must vote for George Bush or your children and grandchildren will live in a totalitarian, atheistic, gay, pornographic state where they won't get to experience the wonders of gunning down nature. What kind of life will my children and my grandchildren have if John Kerry is elected President? Will they live in daily fear, as the Israelis do, of a homicide bomber striking at the mall or the local pizza parlor? Will they have the freedom to voice their opinions without the fear of reprisal from the government? Will they be able to worship freely and express their love of God openly? Will they be able to include the words "under God" when saying the Pledge of Allegiance in public? [...] Will the children learn the three R's in school or will they be taught about diversity, sexual preference equality and pornography posing as art? Will English still be taught as the primary language? Will they be able to take their children hunting for the first time? Will they be able to teach gun safety and the responsibility of gun ownership? Will they get to experience the wonder of nature as it awakens while sitting in a duck blind on the river?   No!  Because John Kerry will not only surrender to Osama, he will also ban God, reading and writing, the English language, and guns. There is only one way to preserve our country and keep it safe for future generations. There is only one way to ensure that our children's' children are able to grow up in a country that values each and every life. There is only one way to maintain that moral compass that our founding fathers wrote of. There is only one way to ensure that our future generations are free to speak, to worship and to live. We must re-elect President George W. Bush on November 2, 2004. For our sakes and for the sake of future generations.  I would have thought that we might have to, you know, actually work to ensure some of these things, but apparently all we have to do is vote for Bush, and then we will be living in the golden age of safety, conformity, and family values. 5.  Barbara Stock also weighs in on the Osama message. We received a video tape from a murderer, addressing the American people. Well, isn't that just special. The Church Lady lives! Anyway, here's a bit more of her column: Osama refers to how the president sat reading to children while 50,000 Americans needed him. What, exactly, the president could have personally done from hundreds of miles away is not clear. Despite being the president of the United States, Bush is not God. If it wasn't the Church Lady saying it, I would call this blasphemy against our Lord and Savior George Bush. And Barbara, what the President could have personally done is something besides sit there like a stunned bunny and then fly around in Air Force One for the rest of the day.  You know, be a leader or something? 6.  Monte Kuligowski is new to our pages, so let's read part of his bio: Monte Kuligowski is a Virginia attorney and a member of the bar of the United States Supreme Court. [...] As a Christian and conservative, Monte desires to see the Judeo-Christian foundations of our nation restored. Now that you know that, you won't be surprised to learn that Monte's column is entitled "John Kerry: President Of The Counter Culture Not The United States."  It's about how the Vietnam war was the worst war ever, because while we've recovered from the Civil War (in that even most  Southerners now admit that slavery isn't right), some people still refuse to admit that they were wrong to protest the war. The Vietnam era was different and the counter culture it produced refuses to be assimilated back into the fabric of the whole. The old and grey protesters still believe they were right. The movement was led by a group of spoiled, rebellious young people who thought they knew better than their parents and grandparents. Now they believe they know better than Joe America. Damned hippie punks!  Cut your hair, hippies, and admit that Joe SixPack America is your superior! The counter culture, now made up of people we call liberals, is working hard to become the dominant culture. Without question they now dominate the media, the Hollywood community and the academic world. The rebellious generation unleashed a flood that is hard to reverse and its waters seem to rise with each new generation. America now finds herself smack in the middle of a culture war and the nation is divided like never before. Liberals refuse to unite again as one nation under God. Monte apparently believes that the Vietnam War was between the establishment and the counterculture.  And when the establishment won in Saigon, the counterculture refused to apologize and conform like it was supposed to. No one embraces and espouses the values of the counter culture more than John Kerry – after all, he led the movement. Sen. Kerry is a walking definition of the word liberal. John Kerry was the leader of the whole counterculture?  You'd think that he would have gotten more publicity. Even though the general public knows little about Sen. Kerry, enough is known to compel sensible Democrats to vote against him. Mr. Kerry was the president of the counter culture revolution which weakened and continues to weaken the nation. Let’s not ensure our country’s fall by making him president of the total culture.  And if Bush is reelected, HE gets to be president of the total culture?  Wow, and I thought he just got to be our political and spiritual leader. 7.   Michael Mina is "the Interim President of the Ohio Republican Assembly."  He claims that liberals think they are gods, which is probably a good thing, because if they believed in the Greek gods, then John Edwards would be responsible for the death of Christopher Reeves. Consider the hubris: "If we do the work that we can do in this country, the work that we will do when John Kerry is president," John Edwards boasted, "people like Christopher Reeve are going to walk, get up out of that wheelchair and walk again." Thus would John Edwards play John the Baptist to Kerry's Christ. The death of Mr. Reeve shortly thereafter was a terrible tragedy. Greek and Roman Pagans might have attributed that to Edwards' hubristic claims, which they believed brought down the wrath of their gods. But if you are your own god, acting for what you see as the betterment of humanity, hubris is not a danger, it is a perverse strategy for evangelism.  George Bush said to the terrorists, "Bring it on," and we now have over 1000 Americans dead in Iraq.  But when you are doing God's will, hubris isn't a danger, it's steadfastness and resolve. 8.   Darren Bernard is apparently a regular columnist for The Minnesota Daily, which is a college paper.  But that's no excuse, really. President George W. Bush has turned out to be a real pick for U.S. voters. I swear, the first two times I read that, I thought it said "prick." With the vision of former President Ronald Reagan, Dubya has implemented an astute domestic policy that has created nearly 2 million jobs in the last year, reformed Medicare and improved education by increasing funding for our kids by a breathtaking 49 percent. If your breath gets taken away by a 49% increase in federal funding for something that is largely funded at the state and local level, then you're pretty young.  And how many jobs has Bush's astute policy lost, and how well is that reformed Medicare serving the nation's elderly?  Sorry, like former President Ronald Reagan, Darren is unable to hear your questions. With the integrity of William Bennett, the president has indicted more than 500 corporate crooks with his Corporate Fraud Task Force and implemented Sarbanes-Oxley legislation to demand total accountability from U.S. companies. (Even from — gasp — Halliburton!) Um, yeah, with the integrity of William Bennett. And with the determination of Winston Churchill, Bush has led two brilliant wars to oust two sadistic regimes and free populations that are beginning to breathe the air of democracy. Well, the dead ones aren't breathing anything, but some of the the living ones are beginning to breathe the air of democracy.  It smells like bombs, blood, and chaos.  Those wars are brilliant, all right! Well, that's our election day wingnut roundup.  Now get out there are vote for the non-wingnut candidates of your choice. 5:09:29 AM

Who Said It? You people are unbelievably bright.  Yes, yesterday's mystery guest, the guy who promised that he would stop punditing and start garroting palace guards in Africa if Kerry won, was Mark Steyn.  Let's all vote for Kerry today and wish Steyn well in his new line of work. Now, who said the following: Iraq is still dangerous. It is dangerous because that society is becoming more free and heading toward democracy.   (No, it wasn't Osama.) Okay, here's one more quote, from a different well-known person: "I was all for stem-cell research funding before I found out that this proposal actually does involve cloning," [...] told Ingraham. "This is a raping of the California taxpayers." And is this person against the actual rape of Californians?  Hopefully so.  But presumably killing embryos is worse. Here's part of the Christianity Today write-up of this person's appearance on Good Morning America: Meanwhile, viewers saw images of Christopher Reeve and Michael J. Fox suffering from injury and disease, as if to "prove" that embryonic research is clearly necessary. (Apparently, a defenseless human embryo is worth less than a suffering Hollywood celebrity.) The human embryos used in stem-cell research are about 7 days old (not developed enough to attach to the uterine wall).  They are smaller than a pinpoint.  Looking at one under a microscope, it is difficult to distinguish a human embryo from a fish embryo.  But one of them is worth just as much as a Christopher Reeve or a Michael J. Fox.  Obviously -- per, Christianity Today. Anyway, which two people are quoted above? 4:09:13 AM