February 6, 2005 by s.z.

World O'Crap Book Club

Today we take a look at a couple of new books from Regnery.  Why?  So that undiscriminating millionaires will know which books to bulk buy, so as to manipulate the best sellers lists.  They can then donate these tomes to Republican orphans and take a substantial tax break.

Our first book alerts us to the fact that elitists are attacking our way of life, seducing our children, and polluting our precious bodily fluids.  Sure, maybe this isn't exactly a new claim, but reinforcing cherished delusions of victimhood is what got Regnery where it is today: on Satan's payroll. 

Invasion Within: Overcoming the Elitists' Attack on Moral Values and the American Way by Domenick Maglio 
Regnery Publishing, Inc.; Hardcover - 256 pages (January 2005) 

A Culture War is raging in America today.

Beneath the polished exterior of America’s most cherished institutions lies a burgeoning cultural movement striving to countermand the minds of our citizens, beginning with our very youngest.

Let's start by nitpicking this fine ad copy (which Domenick may have written himself).  Do you think that the writer really wanted to say that elitists are "countermanding" (meaning to "revoke" or "recall") the minds of young conservatives?  If so, don't you think that a book about mindless Young Republicans, wandering the streets in search of brains like the zombies of Night of the Living Dead,would make a livelier book than the one Domenick appears to have written?

This Invasion Within has already infiltrated our schools, our media, and even our families, and threatens to bring down our society if left unchecked.

So, I guess that beneath the polished exterior of your family lies a burgeoning cultural movement that is striving to countermand your kids' minds.  I bet it's your wife or husband!!!

Most frightening is the Elitists who, at the helm of this invasion’s feigned enlightenment, try to bestow insidious and deeply harmful dogmas upon everyday Americans.

Yes, the Elistists who bestow insidious dogmas IS the most frightening.  I call them Hillary Clinton. 

They do not hesitate in knocking from their pedestals every freedom and every value for which our forefathers fought the Revolution.

The freedom of not paying tax to England has been knocked from its pedestal by these jerks!  Oh, and I think I saw them smacking around the value of discriminating against homosexuals, which is what our forefathers fought and died for at Bunker HIll.

The enemies are the Elitists, smug in their attitude as they mug us of our moral values, who have infiltrated our schools, churches, boardrooms, and media: I call them “Smuggers.”

You know, because they're smug muggers.  Oh, and I think that people like Domenick are wanton cankers on society: I call them "wankers." 

Their original strategy was formulated in the 1930s, and has since spread as they continue to poison the individual’s religious and cultural beliefs and thus dissolve the structure of the traditional family—and our nation—from within. The Culture War will not stop with the annihilation of the American Way, but will merely use our society as a foothold to obliterate Western civilization as we know it.

And then the world!!!

Anyway, it sounds like the Smuggers held a conference in the 1930s (probably chaired by Lenin), and it was at this meeting of the Axis of Not-Niceness that thw Smuggers formulated a scheme to destory the religious and cultural beliefs of individuals by saying bad things about John Wayne and the Inquisition.  And if they succeed in their plan to make people question the idea of American exceptionalism, then Western civilization as we know it is doomed, DOOMED!

The casualties of this war—the increasing divorce rate, irresponsible parenting, out-of-control children, abortions, drug use, corruption, and a culture of lying—are apparent all around us. Celebrity Elitists ridicule our belief in God, sanctity of marriage, definition of life, the existence of evil, and the exceptionality of our culture.

Damn those Celebrity Elitists, who have made us get divorces, caused our children to be bratty, forced us to take drugs and be corrupt, and then ridiculed the exceptionability of our culture!

Anyway, apparently Domenick's book is our secret weapon against these Elitists -- possibly the bad writing works on them like the germs did on the Martians in War of the Worlds, causing them to shrivel up and die.

In any case, I'm sure you'll be seeing a lot of Domenick on Fox News in the near future -- unless a gang of smuggers takes him out first.  You know, as part of their plot to destroy civilization as we know it.
 

Our second book was written by a pundit whose publicist came up with a great way to drum up interest in a book that won't come out until next year: get caught promoting administration policies for tax money!

The New Racists: How Liberal Democrats Have Betrayed Minority Americans 
by Armstrong Williams

Product Details
Hardcover: 256 pages 
Publisher: Regnery Publishing (January 1, 2006)

From the Inside FlapWho are the new racists? "The liberals who’ve cast aside the dream of racial equality and equal opportunity in favor of votes, power, fame, and money," says Armstrong Williams, conservative columnist and leader of a new generation of black voters unwilling to tow the old liberal line.

Because towing liberal lines and towing impounded cars (as well as toting bales, and going one toke over the line) are some things that Armstrong (and the whole generation of black voters he leads) are unwilling to do.

In this shocking new book, based on Williams’s insider access to the black establishment, he fingers the new racists to include:

• Julian Bond and the NAACP whose goal is to deliver the black vote to Democrats in return for big dollar contributions.
• The Democratic Party that takes the minority vote for granted—and counts on it being poor.
• The liberal media that has shamelessly used the vilest racial stereotypes to attack eminent black Americans like Clarence Thomas and Condoleezza Rice.

Yes, vile racial stereotypes like "incompetent." 

That's NOT a racial stereotype, you say?  Well, then why are people always saying it about Armstrong, who is also an eminent black American?

• The teachers’ unions who fight against school vouchers that allow poor kids to go to private schools instead of being trapped in failing public schools.

This point brought to you by George Bush's Department of Education, which paid $10,000 for this chance to remind you that faith-based school vouchers are da bomb!

• Abortion advocates who have encouraged the killing of more blacks than the Klu Klux Klan ever did.

Because allowing a black woman to make her own decision about her pregnancy is the same as stringing up a black man.

• Democrats in Congress such as Harry Reid who refuse to confirm conservative minority judicial candidates because it sends the wrong political message.

Refusing to confirm minority judicial candidates for any reason is racism, of course.  And only Armstrong has the courage to tell you this.

Williams unveils the great secret that the media’s kept too long: Blacks and other minorities support traditional values, faith-based initiatives, school vouchers, reforming affirmative action, and personal Social Security accounts—many of the same policies conservatives support.

In fact, the media has kept this secret so long that not even blacks and minorities know that they are really conservatives!

In the New Racists, Armstrong Williams reveals the unsavory alliance between the liberal establishment, celebrity black civil rights leaders, the media elite, and the teachers’ unions—

Teachers' unions who opposed No Child Left Behind, you will recall!  (Well, if you don't recall it, then that quarter of a million in tax dollars was totally wasted.)

and he shows why blacks will start abandoning the Democrats and provides Republicans a strategy to accelerate the exodus.

I think Armstrong's strategy to help the Republicans get blacks to abandon the Demoncratic Party would go something like this :

Step one: Pay me, Armstrong Williams, to write a book about why the Democrats are the real racists.

Step two: Pay me, Armstrong Williams, to appear on Fox News and other conservatative media outlets to sell my book about why the Democrats are the real racists.

Step three: Buy crates of my book, to get it on the best sellers lists so that African-Americans will hear about it and believe that the Democrats are the real racists.

Step four: If you nominate more incompetent conservative minorities to important positions like Secretary of State, then the Democrats will look like racists when they oppose these nominees.  Therefore, you should nominate me, Armstrong Williams, to be Condi Rice's sham husband.

Step five: Give me, Armstrong Williams, a bunch more money to continue saying that the Democrats are the real racists.  After all, the kind of credibility I have with the black community can't be bought.  

Anyway, those are our WO'C Book Club Regnery selections for this month.  If you don't want to receive them, do nothing, and they won't be shipped to you and you won't be billed $27.95 each for them.  And you won't have to read them either, of course -- although this convenience will cost you $27.95 a pop.

5:46:26 PM