College Hooligans Glue Wiener to Ann's HandReader Tex shares with us the Arizona Daily Wildcat story about Ann's near brush with pie. Sadly, both pies were killed in the incident. The throwers were arrested. Ann, who was protected by her Strategic Defensive Manhands, didn't get any whipped cream in her mouth, and so no purging was necessary. At least, not by her -- after reading the report of what Ann spoke about, I have no such hopes for the audience.
Ted Bundy was a serial killer. Ted Bundy ended up in Florida. Therefore, there is a distinct connection between Ted and Jeb Bush (despite what Republicans have said). In fact, I'm pretty sure that Jeb was complicit in Ted's murders.
While I don't think that we went to war for oil (nor do I think that more than a couple Democrats argue that we did), the fact that gas is really high-priced now mightjust indicate that George screwed that up too. Failure is not evidence of pure intentions.
Well, DUH, Ann. The FAA was probably warned by the FBI that terrorists had read all those wingnut articles demanding racial profiling in airports, and so the terrorists were now disguising themselves as blonde women while on their missions to test airport security by going to the bathroom a lot. Experts advise that you can spot these fake women by looking at their hands and throats. But once again, we see Ann's intense desire for a job in the glamorous world of airport security screening. Sadly, her dreams must once again be crushed, because she's just not qualified -- if only she had completed that class at the community college like George Bush advised her to!
Assuming that Ann is right (which is improbable on the face of it, because when has she ever been right about anything?) and the next terrorist attack is going to be committed by one or more Muslims, what would she have us do? Strip-search and interrogate everybody who looks Muslim? What does a Muslim look like? Some of them are blonde -- so, will Ann support a plan that calls for strip-searching and interrogating all blondes? You know, if it could prevent a terrorist attack?
"While you probably disagree with Bush on many important issues, you have to vote for him anyway, because ultimately he couldn't care less what you think about important issues, and you're screwed in any case."
For $20,000, the least Ann could do was take a pie like a man. 6:41:12 AM ![]() |
"The Indiana Jones of the Right"Our friends at WorldNetDaily have a special offer for us:
Well, if I could use an ice pick . . .
But you can call him Dr. Wingnut.
Well, you can get some of his mind-stretching insights at NewsMax (like the famous one where he scratches out the eyes of Peggy Noonan for saying mean things about her fellow Reagan speech writers); at the Moonie Times (for instance, one in which he brags of having first outted Hillary Clinton as a bisexual in 1993); and CounterPunch (in which he argues that Janet Reno is America's Saddam Hussein). So, for no cents a day, you can probably get all the Dr. Wingnut insights you would ever want.
These are super secret plans that you won't hear about any where else, mostly because Dr. Jack thought of them himself.
He'll give you some magic charms you can secretly place in the clothing of your liberal friends and neighbors, which will free them of the curse of liberalism. And then he'll explain that conservatism is the political theory which was released by Pandora when she opened the forbidden box, and so it is based on the primitive fear of sex.
It takes some doing to move those other countries around itself, but China does have the manpower to accomplish such a task.
If only it had some banks, it could probably get brides by appearing on "Who Wants to Marry China?" -- but alas, it's hard to look your best on reality TV without water.
Wow, it all seems so obvious after Dr. Jack points it out!
Dr. Jack, I hate to upset such a neat construct, but I'm pretty sure that there are many descendants of slave owners who are not black, and many descendants of slaves whose families never profited from owning slaves themselves. But don't let me put a damper on the flow of those mind-stretching, pro-America insights.
And after that, comes the push for the legalization of sodomization of groups consisting of a football team, their fathers, a rock, a tree, a box turtle, a puppy, and Rick Santorum.
Um, no you didn't. Is that where he learned about the plan for the legalization of group sodomization?
Sly wanted to use it as the basis for the sequel to Stop or My Mom Will Shoot. So, what do people say about Jack Wheeler?
And what do people say about Dana Rohrabacher? "Even for a Republican from CA, he's much crazier than seems humanly possible. "
And what do people say about Richard Poe? That he wrote Hillary's Secret War, the book which claims that Hillary Clinton's insidious "Shadow Team" killed Vince Foster, murdered Brit Hume's son, and tried to frame Rush Limbaugh on drug charges. That's all they NEED to say.
![]() ![]() The Real Indy The Mere Cartoon
At age 20, he started his second business, a sucessful white slavery ring. At age 21, he used the teaching of his Shuara Jivaro brothers to shrink the heads of his business rivals. At age 22, he discovered Nazi gold on the moon. At age 52, he started To The Point™ in an effort to get twenty-nine cents a day from a bunch of suckers.
Wow, I can hardly wait for those nice young Generation Yers to seize control of the popular culture, and force kids wear their baseball caps normally. Thanks, Dr. Jack Wingnut, for giving me hope for our future!
And then we'll have an era of public morality, conformity, and hypocrisy for a while, and then it will be back to degeneration. That's how these cycles work.
I don't get mad at what's wrong with our culture so much as I get irritated by Xers like Ben Shapiro who write about how great it is for other people to risk their lives in Iraq and Afghanistan to preserve our freedom of speech (without ever explaining the connection between the two), and yet never serve themselves. And I can tell you, if we ever need another Patton or Eisenhower and we're forced to make do with a Ben Shapiro, we're screwed.
Yes, To the Point is intended to be a service to old, crabby guys who gripe about cynical Gen Xers while defending liberty from their recliners. You know, people like my Dad.
I'll never have to travel with a liberal again? Why, that's like a beautiful dream come true, and by itself is worth twnety-nine cents. Thanks again, Dr. Jack, for helping to make this country a more polarized place.
Sorry, Dr. Wingnut, I already have my own pointy-headed family. But thanks anyway. 2:16:13 AM |
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